Black Beauty
by ChasingWolves
Summary: Rae has rules that have kept her alive, what happens when she is forced to chose between her 'rules' and saving someone's life? She's convinced that she is better off alone, that it's less complicated that way but what happens when the ones she's running from find her with this new group? Lives will be put in danger and lost, the only question is who will survive? OC/DARYL
1. Chapter 1

**Black Beauty**

**Chapter one**

**Better off**

*****_ Two Months Ago_*********

The sun was high in the sky warming the peculiarly empty streets below, this was your average perfect day according to Rae. The sky was clear and the wind was gentle like a caressing hand of a lover, it was quiet and seemed to be an all around wonderful day.

Smiling she held the brown paper bag filled with groceries closer to her chest as she walked down the sidewalk. Her cheeks tinted pink as her mind drifted back to the bag boy from the store she had just came from, he was cute and blonde and every time she went there he'd flirt with her in a sweet way. He was so different than any other guy she had previously dated, and then there were the men that normally hit on her that were more often than not drunk and twice her age. Needless to say it was a nice change.

_'Maybe now is the time to get back on that horse'. _The thought had her cheeks turning a slightly darker shade of pink. Distracted by thoughts of finally moving on, of having a chance at a normal happy life it was more than she had dared hope for a year ago, and it left her ignorant to the eerie silence of the dead street. Turning the corner Rae's foot snagged on something and had her tumbling forward and coming down on to her hands and knees, dropping the brown bag and sending the contents spilling all over the curb. The scream stilled in her lungs as her mind froze unable to comprehend what her eyes were taking in.

A severed leg.

Swallowing she could feel how dry her throat was, the action left a scratchy feeling behind in its place. Seconds felt like a life time as sweat started to bead on her forehead, as her eyes fallowed the smeared blood trail, drag marks she vaguely realized as her stomach twisted with dread, on the road a few feet away was the rest of the body.

Her stomach turned as bile rose threatening to overtake her, there on the ground two people sat with their hands digging through the dead body pulling pieces away from it and shoving them into their mouths. Instinctively her hands flew to her mouth in attempt to stifle any sound that threatened to announce her presence. The sobbing that reached her ears as she got to her feet informed her of her failure, and exposed her to the _sick people _as the news had called them.

Every news broad cast she had seen in the past two to three weeks came to the forefront of her mind, every detail about how to avoid them at all costs and lock your doors and how dangerous they were.

One slowly started to make its way to its feet as Rae stumbled backwards, fear gripped her as its jaw snapped hungrily at her. Eager to make her into his next meal. Her heart beat started to pound heavily in her chest as she watched in a terrified state of shock as its arms stretched out towards her and he took its first step. Tears slid down her cheeks as she looked in all directions, she was alone, completely alone with the exception of the one that would soon be trying to eat her.

Her mind clicked into auto pilot as it moaned and lunged for her.

* * *

><p>***<strong><em><span>Present day<span>_******* **

Ducking behind big slabs of concrete that were legs for an overhead bridge Raeanne lowered her eyebrows in a glaring concentration, the sound of men's voices had been the last thing she expected to hear. Pressing her body against the cold cement she let her fingers dance mindlessly around the trigger of her rifle '_Should just wait them out.' _She thought dropping her shoulders, after all Rae had rules when it came to survival, rules that had managed to keep her alive after everyone else she loved had died.

1. You see a heard of walkers, RUN. HIDE. Do NOT be cocky and get yourself killed.

2. You see living humans, if you can avoid them, do.

3. Lone walker? Only pull the trigger if you're ok with every walker within hearing-distance knowing exactly where dinner is.

4. Always, ALWAYS carry a minimum of two weapons.

5. Always know where you will be sleeping BEFORE sunset. Be prepared to move out before daybreak.

6. Don't be a hero.

7. Ration. Ration. RATION. You never know when you will be able to find more food, water or ammo.

8. One shot. One kill. So save one bullet.

Rae had been prepared to hunker down and wait them out, but one thing kept her from doing so the words "She's a beaut." fallowed by a low whistle had her firming her lips. Instantly she knew what the men were gawking at, they had their eyes on her baby.

"Someone took the time ta deck 'er all out. That's fer'sure." Another man replied as Rae crouched low against the wall that separated her from the men, men that were standing between her and her only exit strategy.

"Be a damn shame to leave behind a find like this." Someone else stated obviously in an agreement with the first two, chancing a glance around the corner her eyes widened as panic crept up on her. Four men stood around her baby, checking out her Sierra Hybrid.

"We can grab it on the way back." Another one stated, an Asian by the looks of it but she couldn't be sure at this distance. It was now or never, her survival or theirs. Her survival wasn't something she took lightly it wasn't something she'd jeopardize by giving up her only means of transportation that held her food her weapons and other personal items inside. Clenching her jaw she didn't have any other options, '_it's now or never_.' She repeated in her mind as her grip tightened on her weapon and she stepped out of her hiding place.

The sound of a gun being cocked in to place, had the men's eyes widening as all of them snapped their eyes in the directing it had come from. Whatever any of them had expected to see, it wasn't the lone figure of a woman with long dirty blonde hair dressed in black leather pants and a flowing black sleeveless top pointing an M16 in their collective direction beside the driver side door.

"I'll only tell ya once." She stated trying to keep her voice even and calm, though she felt anything but calm at the moment. "Step away from my ride, keep yer hands where I can see em and back off." She stated glaring down the barrel of her rifle. Two of the men stared wide eyed in shock, while the other seemed just as surprised wearing his cop uniform but kept a calm composure. The last one however looked irritated and was matching her glare head on raising his crossbow to take aim at her. Rae tisked him as she set her sights solely on to the man, "I wouldn't." She stated crossly, "I have an easy trigger finger." The statement had a small smirk pulling at the corner of her lips, it had been so long since she had heard it but in the beginning of this hell it was something she had been told many of times.

"Daryl." The cop growled sending the crossbow wielding man, now known as Daryl, a sideways glance. Huffing the redneck lowered his bow but only slightly so he could lift it back at a moment's notice. "I'm sorry ma'am," The cop began gaining Rae's attention as her eyes flickered over in his direction. "We didn't mean ya any harm." He stated as an unreadable look crossed over his face and he glanced around the area briefly, "ya have ta admit, a vehicle like this is bound to draw attention." He stated as a small smile tugged at the corner of his lips now obviously trying to ease the tension.

He, of course was right. This group of men wasn't the first ones to happen upon her pimped out baby, it was an eye catcher for the living and could easily with a flick of a switch be one for walkers as well. When Rae didn't say anything the man pursed his lips "ya alone?" he asked softly. His question wasn't doing anything for her nerves, as she clenched her jaw. Rae had no trust in humans living or otherwise, she didn't have any faith in humanity or the good in people, not anymore, not after everything she had seen and been through.

"I really don't see how that's any concern of yours." She stated shifting her glare to each pair of eyes, four men that could with ease take her out, that could take her truck and everything she had and leave her for dead stood eyeing her with distrust. That didn't matter to her though, not like it might of in the beginning now everything was different she had nothing left to lose and only one thing to focus on and that was survival, they had each other and as much as that might have made them a threat it also made them venerable.

"Now, I just want ta talk." he stated calmly again trying to defuse the situation, or get her off guard, she wasn't sure which. "Would it be too much ta ask that you lower your gun, ma'am?" Rae's face contorted strangely, that was the second time he had called her ma'am and it was beyond strange to say the least.

"Not going to happen." She stated, again he pursed his lips.

"We aren't gunna hurt you. My name's Rick, Rick Grimes." He stated introducing himself before nodding toward the two that stood a few feet behind him. "That's TDog and Glenn. This 'er is Daryl." He stated jutting his chin towards the man who he had talked down earlier.

"Lovely," She stated not sounding phased in the slightest, and she wasn't, Rae had seen all of the tactics. There was nothing they could say or do to force her to lower her weapon, or drop her guard. Her cold tone sent a chill down Rick's spine as he again assessed the woman, she didn't look older than twenty five and had blood coating her bare arms and splattered onto her exposed collar bone and neck. "If ya don't mind," she started cutting his assessment short as his eyes snapped up to meet her steel like gaze, "I'd like ta be on my way." Rick, the assumed leader of the group nodded and waved back his men as they all took a few steps away from the truck. But remained a little too close for comfort, then again having other living eyes on her even from a good hundred feet away would still feel too close for Rae.

Rae walked to the front of the truck keeping her rifle pointed at them, before turning so she could keep her eyes on them as she kept her back to the truck. Rick couldn't help but tilt his head slightly as he watched her move, it wasn't hard for him or anyone else to see she was on the defensive."Ya must be pretty brave taking the city on by yourself." He stated stilling her movements as she made it to the driver side door, ah the city, infested with walkers. Yeah her hunt for ammo hadn't gone as well as she had hope. Not that she would tell them why she had been in the town square of Atlanta, or the fact that her rifle only had one bullet left. Her bullet.

"Yeah well what can I say, desperate times." She mused as her eyebrows pulled together in irritation she had forgot in her attempt to get the hell outta dodge and back to her safe house that she would first have ta unlock the truck and get inside still keeping her rifle trained on them. "Shit." Rae cursed instantly biting down on her lip as she eyed the four again, the curse if anything was unexpected by the men who were watching her every move. "Go on," Rae jerked her chin "get outta here." She stated trying to not expose the fact she couldn't or wouldn't get in the vehicle and leave her back exposed to them.

"What?" Rick questioned with a raised eyebrow.

"Ya heard me." She stated coolly, "I ain't given ya any chances ta try anything." she stated again starting to feel the overwhelming emotion but pushed back at them she wouldn't lose her composure and give into to her worst nightmares, she couldn't not after all the work she had put into building up her walls of stone, clenching her jaw and firming her hold on the rifle Rae shook the thoughts from her mind.

"I already told ya-" Rick started to say when she cut him off.

"Don't matter, better safe than sorry. No offence, but get your boys and walk away." His eyes widened slightly, defensiveness, caution he understood but he was realizing that her distrust went deeper than that. He was a cop and it was a part of his job to know when someone was lying when there was more to a story than he was being told, of course he could tell she had a story of her own that would explain her instant mistrust of him and his men.

"Common Rick." Glenn stated quietly shifting on his feet, breaking Rick's train of thought as his eyes shifting from the rifle and back to Rick.

"Ya 'fore this crazy bitch blows our heads off." Daryl stated gruffly glaring at the woman.

Rick simply shook his head and sighed, "I'm sorry," he stated fighting back the urge to take a step forward knowing it would more than likely end badly. "For whatever happened ta ya, ta make ya feel like ya can't trust anyone." His words hit her harder then she would have liked to admit as she lowered the rifle a fraction of an inch, something that the men noticed but made no move to take advantage of. It only lasted a moment that her glare faltered, that anyone who was observant and watching her would have seen the tirade of emotions come down on her like a tidal wave, as soon as her lip trembled she stilled it with her teeth and bit back the vulnerable feeling. "We have a group," Rick went on having caught the slight change in her demeanor, "woman, children, my family, safety." It was a sales pitch if she ever heard one, "you're welcome to come back with us." He stated ignoring Daryl's grumbled protests, "you look like you can handle yourself. We could always use more people that could help keep everyone safe."

Rae sighed, "I'm better off on my own." Her words were hollow from having repeated them so often to herself, forcing her to believe them and making the words true.

Her confession as it was perplexed Rick as he eyed her again, "ya sure?" he asked not liking the idea of leaving the girl behind to fend for herself. Rae lowered her weapon further, stunning the men as she held on to it with one hand allowing the butt to rest on her shoulder as her other hand fished in to her pocket in search of her keys.

"Ya," she nodded "no offence but I like it that way." It was only a half lie, Rae hated being on her own she always had, never really liked the quiet even before the shit hit the fan, but it had turned out she hated losing loved ones and fighting off other survivors more. So in that retrospect, she preferred being on her own. '_It's safer, it's easier'_ she told herself, and the best way to keep herself alive. But deep down she knew the real reason why she'd never accept his offer.

"If ya change yer mind our camp is northwest a' here." Rick stated with a slight frown, "tell them I sent ya and ya shouldn't get any trouble." Rae pursed her lips finally pulling out her keys something that earned her a scoff from the crossbow wielding Daryl.

"Its tha end of tha world, and ya still locking up yer truck?" He scoffed rolling his eyes in a disbelieving way, his snipe at her did nothing to deter her as she unlocked her ride.

"Ya think yer the first one ta think she's a beaut?" She mused aloud eyeing him. Rae barely turned to Rick giving him a slight nod before hoping up inside of the truck and closing the door behind her, she rolled down the tinted windows and peered down at the men through her black painted steal bares that were welded on over her windows in vertical rows. "Thanks," She stated catching Rick's eye, "be safe." She stated before glancing toward the city, then back in their directed "it's infested in there."

Rick nodded resting his hands on his hips, "We will, you too..." he trailed off cocking an eyebrow at the girl. "Sorry, I don't think I caught your name." His statement had a puzzled look crossing her face, of course he hadn't she hadn't introduced herself...

"Rae." She stated with a click of her tongue, telling him her name felt both personal and pointless she wasn't going to see them again but still it left an unsettling feeling in the pit of her stomach. Rick nodded and turned to his man as they started to venture into the city, Rae turned the key in the engine as she watched them walk away before they turned the same corner she had appeared from behind. She clicking her tongue a few times as she stared at the empty space, silently scolding herself for feeling the small pang of concern she felt. Closing her eyes she inhaled a deep steadying breath, she warned them that was more than some people would do.

Huffing she pushed the thoughts of the stranger from her mind as she put the truck in drive and started to turn it around. After all Rae had more things to worry about, like mapping out a new game plan for possible locations where she could get her hands on ammo and then get the hell out of dodge, and be on her way to Fort Benning like the plan had been from the beginning. Perhaps she should try to raid the police station, meeting the cop had at least given her an idea. Where all the bars had failed her, hopefully the station would be her saving grace.

* * *

><p>***<strong><em><span> Two Months Ago<span>_*********

Her body slumped against the closed door that shielded her from the outside world, as tears fell freely down her cheeks and she shook with fear. Rae had seen the chaos on TV but she had never believed that she would ever have to face what the news was constantly podcasting about, instead she had seen it and scoffed at it, things like that just didn't happen. Not in real life anyway. This wasn't some horror film, she didn't live in a place where bodies littered the street! This was Atlanta for god's sake! The city that promised safety to all that came looking for it, it was her home, these things just didn't happen they were thing's of nightmares they were not real...they couldn't be real.

The sound of her back door swinging closed had her head snapping up, "hello?" she called out hearing the crack in her own voice had her wincing, after all the time taking self defense classes so she wouldn't feel weak anymore and here she was still just a scared woman. Gritting her teeth together she took a step forward and squared her shoulders, "is someone there?" she asked again fighting back the feeling of how movie cliché it was starting to feel. That sound of moaning hit her first before what was left of an older lanky man stumbled into the hallway from her kitchen.

"Oh god. David?" Her voice wavered as he started towards her, arms stretched out with reaching hands "they got you..." she mumbled before her eyes shifted to her left, her staircase that would lead to two bedrooms and a bathroom.

Swallowing thickly around the fear that was bubbling up under the surface, Rae darting for the stairs narrowly missing the hands of the flesh hungry man that lurched forward at her sudden movement, eager to catch his pray.

Scurrying up the stairs she slipped smashing her knee against a stair, "shit." she seethed as fresh tears sprung to her eyes as her knee throbbed, glancing behind her she seen the approaching danger staggering up the first two stairs. Swallowing around the lump in her throat Rae was on her feet practically throwing herself up the remainder of the stairs and into the first open door to slam it closed behind her. Taking in a ragged breath she glanced up taking in where she now stood, hiding in the bathroom that had a broken lock for a doorknob.

Groaning she hit her head lightly off the door, hearing the dead man's own grown she glared at the offending noise. '_Stupid dead people.' _The thought crossed her mind as she took a step back looking for a weapon, now wasn't the time to think over how they weren't supposed to be walking around, or wondering how the hell the world had made a turn like this. No, now was the time to arm herself. She watched the news, knew the only way to kill them was a bullet to their head but seeing as her hand gun was stashed away in a locked drawer beside her bed she'd have to pray that any head injury would kill it off...or at least buy her enough time to get out of immediate danger.

Glancing to the mirror the thought of breaking it crossed her mind, followed by the thought of the smashing sound and possibly cutting herself on it. Again her eyes shifted around the room taking in her limited options. A hair dryer that she could beat it with, a towel hanging on its pole attached to the wall, bath products, razors...yeah she'd be lying if she said that the situation wasn't concerning, to say the least. With a sigh Rae tugged off the towel and let it drop to the floor before pulling the pole out of its sockets that held it in place.

Breathing deeply she knew no matter what she only had one shot, it was either kill the man -no, it wasn't a man not anymore now it was just a dead lifeless corpse, or she would die trying.

She could hear it now scratching at the door, pressing its rotting blood stained body against it. It wouldn't be long before its body weight was enough to push the broken door open, "one shot." Rae stated holding the pole up by her head. "That's all you've got." The door swung open letting the rotting corpse of a man stumble in, his jaw snapped at her as he let out a hungry growl. Instincts kicked in, lunging forward she threw her body into his knocking them to the ground as she stabbed the pole deep within its eye socket.

Everything was still, a ragged breath left her lips as she dared to look. Bile raised in her throat seeing his decayed dead face inches below her own. The sound of feet coming up the stairs had her tensing, "shit...shit." she mumbled repeatedly attempting to pull the pole out of the skull, and failing as her hands slipped in the blood that coated the metal.

"Rae? Oh my god." Hearing her sister's voice her head snapped up with wide eyes, taking in the three figures standing at the top of her stairs her stomach plummeted as the scene dawned on her.

"I...I didn't have a choice." she stated with her lip trembling before she met the eyes of her father who had a grim expression firmly in place.

* * *

><p><strong>You disappear with all your good intentions<strong>

**An all I am is all I could not mention**

**Like who will bring me flowers when it's over**

**And who will give me comfort when it's cold**

**"Flowers For A Ghost" -Thriving Ivory**

Hey guys, this is a story I started awhile back so I do have a few chapters done and I intend to upload chapter two tomorrow. So please review! :)


	2. Chapter 2

**Black Beauty**

**Chapter two**

**Use Somebody**

*****_Present day_*********

The loud sound of a nearby explosion had Rae falling off her make shift bed as it pulled her out from her dreaming state, "The hell?" She mumbled getting up off the floor, and moving to the small window that was above the pull out couch she had been sleeping on. Squinting out the window she did a quick look around, but couldn't pin point the location of the noise.

_'What the hell just happened?' _She wondered before deciding to get a better look. Scowling the blonde turned and picked up her hand gun that sat on the end table, tucking it in to the waist band of the jeans she had worn to bed, she moved to garb the binoculars next before turning and making her way to the door without bothering to put her boots back on she exited the small apartment.

Making her way to the roof for a better look around she rubbed the sleep from her eyes as she climbed the stair case, it wasn't often she would let herself sleep in. But after all the time she spent on the move constantly looking over her shoulder, it was hard to not enjoy the seeming safety that she had found herself in. Placing the binoculars to her eyes as she stood near the front of the building, peering down the street in each direction she found that it was eerie quiet and still, turning she checked out the other nearby roads that had a few walkers all heading in the same direction.

Following their lead she glanced up ahead in the direction they were all walking in, sucking in a startled breath when her eyes landed on what once had been the CDC that was now surrounded in thick black smoke. Furrowing her eyebrows as she pulled down the binoculars, Rae couldn't push back the strange feeling that the image caused her. She had thought that the bombing days to fight back against the walking dead were long past, rooted in her spot as a tirade of confusing emotions and thoughts came one after another. If it was the military, did that mean that everything would be looking up soon?

She couldn't be sure, the only thing Rae was sure about was that the explosion would draw in every flesh hungry ghoul for miles. "So much for getting out of dodge today." She stated aloud pursing her lips, before a strange and unexpected image caught her attention. Down below, on the street that her hide out was facing was a moving caravan that was coming to a stop. That sight only meant more trouble to Rae, now not only did she have to worry about the geeks she would also have to keep an extra low profile because now the living was moving in to the neighborhood.

Clenching her jaw as the tick of irritation set in she crouched down in case any of them looked up in her direction, and scurried forward to the edge lifting the binoculars back up to her face. Again her expression twisted in irritation as she watched the group of at least ten get out of their vehicles. Silently Rae watched as the group assembled directly in front of the building across the way, tension built in her stomach. '_Just leave...' _the four story building across the way was one she had made the mistake of exploring when she had first arrived, in short the place was nothing if not a death trap.

Her eyes narrowed as she watched who she assumed to be the leader getting all of his people where he wanted them, the men wielded weapons as the woman and children were placed in the center. That's when she realized they were all going in to scout the place, together. _'It's reckless, they'll all get killed' _ She started to gnaw at her lower lip, she had gone in alone and barely made it out alive...the thought of a group, with children going in was troubling to say the least. She continued to survey the group that was making its way to the door of the building, when her eyes froze on one individual.

To the right of the group, near the head of it was a man with a crossbow. Tension settled heavy on her shoulders, what were the odds that this was the group that the men she had met the other day, were apart of? Dropping the binoculars she stood with her hands on her waist, if they went inside and died did that make it their blood on her hands? In the world that this was it seemed like the blood stained more than just her hands now a days.

Clicking her tongue she turned to make a hurried exit back to the small apartment, taking the stairs two at a time and pulling open the door to grab her boots that she zipped up to half way up her calf. Darting for her bag to get her hatchet out, it was then that she realized she was actually going in. Heaving a sigh she turned and began to run, she didn't know the odds of how long the group would have after the biters found them but in a big group she never liked the odds of them being stealthy.

Rae made it to the main floor, what was once a small cozy restaurant and paused by the front door as she peered out to check the street for walkers, seeing the street was clear of the undead she started undoing the locks one by one than made her way swiftly across the street trying to push back the thoughts about how surreal this whole thing was.

This was the second time the same group was making her break her second rule, which didn't go unnoticed by the woman. But this was more than her second rule, this was also rule six. **Don't be a hero.** Risking her own safety for others was something she hadn't done in about two weeks or so. It was also something she wasn't completely comfortable with, but as the scream pierced the air Rae ducked through the door weapon raised and at the ready.

Everything that happened next seemed to happen all at once, one of the men she had met the other day -TDog she recalled- was staring at her with wide surprised eyes, a man was snapping at someone "Stuff a sock in it, or I will!" Decaying arms were reaching out from her left, a woman was snapping back "Don't you talk to her like that!" Rae spun with her raised hatchet and sunk it into the side of a walkers scull, cutting through the disorganized panic that the group was.

All eyes were turning towards her in shock, as the sound of moaning became louder and was getting closer by the second Rae found herself becoming irritated with the groups pour decision. "Outside," Rae breathed glancing towards the group, "now."

Some nodded in response not questioning the girl, "ya heard 'er get outside." Rick stated as the group exited the building. Rae closed the doors behind her as she was the last to exit, backing up a few steps she kept her eyes on the doors waiting for what she knew was coming. Everyone was talking at once behind her, mostly sounding panicked and scared some were asking who she was, where she had come from, Daryl she recognized was bitch'n that they had turned tail and left just because she had said so. Rae turned her glare from the door that walkers were no pressing themselves up against and pinned him with it.

"Ya think ya could've killed 'em all?" Rae spat irritation growing in the pit of her stomach by the second. She didn't wait for his response as she spun on her heel and started walking across the street. _'People are idiots, complete morons' _she ranted internally with each step as the sound of her boot heel clicked against the pavement, almost echoing her irritation.

"Rae, wait!" Rick was the one to call out over the women who were asking where she was going, she paused chewing on her lip as she shifted her weight from foot to foot before glancing behind her.

"Ya com'in?" She asked keeping her voice neutral, to say Rick hadn't expected her abrupt appearance or her offer to follow her was an understatement as he stood there shocked for a brief moment. It had only lasted a few seconds before the man nodded and directed his people to get what stuff they needed. Rae continued to walk across the street as the group gathered their personal belongings, pausing by the opened door she waited eyeing them with a slight frown. '_I best not end up regretting this.' _She thought holding back a sigh as they all started heading her way.

Once everyone was inside the restaurant Rae started to lock the door, it was an eerie quiet as they watched her do first the chain lock followed by the deadbolt lock and finished by the lock that dropped at the bottom of the door.

"Why is she locking us is?" A woman whispered, sighing Rae turned to face the group.

"It's nothing personal." Rae stated sifting uncomfortably under their gazes "Can't have a stray wondering in." She stated avoiding their gazes, finding it easier to calm herself by looking around the familiar place rather than the unfamiliar faces.

"A stray?" Rick was the one to ask with a raised brow.

"Walker, human, don't matter what kind." She stated pursing her lips to stop herself from stating that _'No one gets in here,' _seeing as obviously that was no longer the case.

Rae started to make her way around the group keeping her eyes ahead of herself, "feel free ta take a look around. Place is small," she stated trying to ignore the feeling of their eyes on her back. "I've got a small apartment upstairs, if ya need me, that's where I'll be." She hadn't expected the group to slowly follow after her when they were done whispering to each other, but they had and knowing that they weren't far behind, she left the apartment door wide open and walked in heading straight for her bags.

The sound of shuffling feet drew her attention back to the group that stood half way in the doorway and half outside of it, her eyes fell on Rick first watching as he glanced around then to the man beside him who was looking as irritated as she felt, on Rick's other side stood a woman with a child in front of her, her hands resting on his shoulders with a tired look on her face. It was then she remembered Rick saying his family was among the group that she straightened leaving her hatchet on top of one of her bags. Bawling her hands in to fists she suppressed a sigh, she had invited them in and there was no going back on that now, so with that thought in mind it was best to play nice and since in a pre apocalyptic world you would tell your guests to make themselves at home she figured that was what was expected of her.

"It's small," She stated bringing what eyes she could see at the front of the group to her, "it should do ya for the night." Pursing her lips together she gave them a shrug, hoping to shrug off the feeling of unease "make ya self at home I guess."

"Thank you," Rick nodded being the first to take a few steps in to the room, he stopped behind the living room chair placing a hand on the back of it as the rest of his group filtered through the door way. "I have ta admit, I'm surprised to see ya here. Expected ya to be long gone."

His statement was met with a shrug, "still had a few things ta do before I headed out." She stated in a way that left no room for argument.

Rick gave her a nod before sending another quick look around the small apartment, from where he stood he could see the entire living room and kitchen as well as a door at each end of the long single room that was only divided by a kitchen island. "Nice place."

Rae shifted again on her feet, "it serves its purpose." she stated wetting her bottom lip, small talk had never been her strong suite.

"The other door in the hall," Rick started inclining his head back to indicate the way he had just come from "that another apartment?" he asked.

"Stairs," Rae stated, "leads ta the roof. Good place to keep look out." she added as an afterthought. Rick just nodded with a slight frown. "There's a bed room in there," she stated after a brief pause, "up for grabs." Again the man nodded with a grateful expression, Rae's eyebrows pulled together as she recalled the first conversation she had with Rick. "I thought ya said ya were Northwest of Atlanta." Glancing up she met his gaze, "what the hell ya doing in Atlanta with a group this big?"

Honestly it wasn't her business, which became clear when more than a few stiffened at her straight forwardness but as far as the blonde was concerned if she was housing them then she deserved to know why. "We lost a few people," Rick started to explain albeit reluctantly as his group started to spread out a little more. Rae subconsciously stepped back bumping in to the end table as a few of the men headed to sit on the couch, intending on making themselves comfortable. "We came looking for answers," Rick stated, if he had noticed the way Rae shifted uncomfortably he didn't show it, "went ta the CDC."

Hearing that had Rae's lips pursing together, "been there a few times." She stated with a nod surprising Rick and a few others, "it caught fire a little while ago...didn't it?" she asked chancing a glance over her shoulder to look out the window that she had looked out earlier, not that she could see the CDC since it was on other side of the building.

"How'd ya know that?" Glenn asked blinking in surprise as he stood beside the old television set.

"Was up on the roof," Rae stated meeting his gaze "that's how I knew ya'll were in that death trap."

"Death trap?" Repeated the woman to Rick's right, the mother looked shocked and concerned obviously not liking the idea of still being so close in proximity.

"Ya," Rae nodded slowly "bout thirty or so of those walkers in there." She stated hearing the murmur of shock and fear spread.

"How ya know that?" A man with thick black hair asked eyeing the woman.

"Cause I've checked the places closest ta here out," she stated raising an eyebrow in silent challenge.

"You?" He scoffed "all by yourself?" Of course it came down to that, she was only one woman after all and apparently women in this world didn't know how to handle themselves long enough to survive for long.

Her irritation spiked as she took a step forward, "yes, me." She stated biting back the words of accusation that wanted to roll off her tongue, she wasn't weak, not anymore.

"What Shane means ta say," Rick butted in before Shane apparently, could say anything else. "Yer just one person," he stated his Georgian accent rolling off his tongue "that's pretty impressive. I didn't manage one whole day on my own without almost dying." He confessed with a sympathetic gleam in his eye.

Clenching her jaw Rae bit back the emotions that threatened her, "most of the places only had a few if any inside." she stated turning her gaze from Rick to scan the group again, "Not sure what drew so many in ta that building, maybe they were the employees or some'in but I'd keep ma distance." The warning in her tone was clear, and wasn't missed by anyone, it wasn't a command but a warning all the same. One that everyone would heed.

Turning her gaze on to her begs she again shifted uncomfortably, obviously she wasn't going to do a run and leave strangers with her supplies she'd already made similar mistakes in the past, but still she wanted out of the room that was becoming stifling.

With a sigh she crouched down to shift through her personal bag, the one filled with weapons and clothes. Pulling out her rifle she slid the strap on letting it hang across her back, feeling the eyes on her backside growing in number and most likely in size she opened her mouth to speak. "Going ta take a look up top," she stated feeling awkward having to explain herself before picking up her hatchet and standing to her full height, "maybe go take out a few stragglers." Her eyes shifted from Rick to the small boy beside him and back, "there are some games in the closet there," she gestured to the door beside them "if the kids get bored."

Walking forward the remaining group members that stood near the door all seemed to pull apart making way for the woman carrying a rifle. The last thing she heard as she made it to the staircase door was who she assumed to be Shane say, "I don't like this Rick."

Rolling her eyes she made her way to the roof "ya an me both buddy boy." she mumbled under her breath.

* * *

><p>***<strong><em> Two Months Ago<em>*********

"Dad, seriously that seems a tad bit much." Rae stated standing in the garage with her arms wrapped across her chest, watching as the older man welded bars onto her trucks windows.

"It's going ta get worse, before it gets better." Charles stated without looking back at his eldest daughter, "It always does." Rae firmed her lips hearing her father's pessimism, he hadn't always been the type to say if it can go wrong it probably will, but after her mother -his wife- was taken from them far too soon he didn't really have it in him to be an idealist.

"The CDC is working on the cure." Rae stated after a brief silence.

"And they will continue," Charles stated finally meeting his daughters gaze, "but they won't keep us safe. I've seen it Raeanne, the only ones looking out for us is us." his statement left a bad feeling forming in her gut, they still had the military looking out for them. Didn't they?

"Dad what a-" Rae stopped mid sentence as a blood curdling scream filled the air, "that sounded like it came from outside..." She stated as her eyes went wide.

"You got your gun?" Her father asked moving to pick up one of the baseball bats that sat in the corner of the garage that hadn't been touched in years.

"It's in my bag." Rae stated shifting on her feet before Charles pierced her with a look that stated clearly 'I Told you to keep it on you' resisting the urge to roll her eyes she moved to the back of the truck and hopped up to rummage through her bag. A few moments later Rae jumped back down gun in hand as her father flipped the switch that allowed the garage door to lift open, Rae froze at the sight only one thing registering in her mind as she lifted her hand, gun raised.

_Austin. _He had been her best friend for years, the one person that hadn't thought she was completely crazy when she came home with PTSD and understood her need to take her life back into her own hands, was pulling off a walker from his screaming mother. She barely took notice of Savannah's sobbing form a good ten feet away from the pair or Bo that was running out of his house with a raised frying pan. No there wasn't time, adjusting her grip on the gun she felt the world fade around her as she grit her teeth together and silently prayed she wouldn't hit Austin or his mother, Clementine.

BANG.

* * *

><p>***<strong><em>Present day<em>*********

Maybe an hour past as Rae sat in the camper chair on the roof undisturbed, she had nearly forgotten that other living people were below her until her eyes shifted to the street and stopped on the caravan. Grimacing she let her head lull backwards, at least they hadn't taken off with her belongings -yet anyway.

The sound of the squeaking from the roof's door had her shoulders sagging and her eyes shifting back towards the offensive sound and her intruder. Her eyebrows raised in surprise, out of all the ones she thought would come up first it sure hadn't been the old man. "Mind if I join you?" He asked as he started walking towards her, turning to face forward again she rolled her eyes.

"Go a'head." She stated when he was close enough to hear without trouble.

"My name is Dale Horvath, I don't believe we've been formally introduced." He stated with a small polite smile, extending a hand that Rae eyed warily.

"Rae." She stated curtly, reaching over to shake his hand once before dropping it.

"It was a mighty nice thing ya did," Dale stated eyeing the young woman with a look she couldn't read, "Ya could've saved someone's life." His statement brought her eyes to his, seeing the doubtful look in them he continued "seriously. Thank you."

Shrugging she started to shift uncomfortably, "it wasn't a big deal." She lied, in fact it was because every time she had come in contact with living people she got hurt and regretted it so helping them not only broke her rules it also left her exposed.

"But it was, a few of the guys are going to head out for a quick run." He stated catching her off guard, "try ta find some food ta celebrate."

"Celebrate?" Rae repeated as her eyebrows pulled together, '_what the hell was there to celebrate?' _She couldn't help but to think as she eyed him disbelievingly.

"That we're alive," he stated "that instead of losing more people we've gained one." His words left an undesirable taste in her mouth as she stood up from her chair rather abruptly.

"Listen, not ta be rude." Rae stated coldly, "I'm not looking for a group. I did ma part," she stated sending a hand to her chest to emphasize her words, "my good deed or whatever." She shrugged it off, "the last thing I want or need is people hanging around getting me killed." Dale stood shocked taken aback by her words, to say he hadn't expected her to flat out tell him that she had no intention of joining them was the last thing he expected after she allowed them into her home. Rae breathed deeply knowing that she had taken out her irritation, her fear and anger at the man unfairly was dawning on her as fast as the words had left her mouth.

"I didn't mean ta upset you." Dale stated with a look akin to disappointment on his face, causing her to shift uncomfortably as her face fell from anger to something that the man couldn't read as her eyes lowered.

"It's been a long day," Rae told him calmly as she clenched her hands into fists at her side, "scratch that it's been a long week." She stated suppressing another sigh, "but I shouldn't take that out on ya," she met his gaze to see the slight surprise settle there "I'm sorry."

Shaking his head a small smile tugged at the corner of his lips, "no need, I shouldn't assume. But think about it," he stated catching her off guard "not being alone, it might not be as bad as ya think it is."

Stiffening her spine to keep her gaze from lowering she decided to change the subject, not wanting to talk about groups and what they brought with them. "I'm a'head back inside." She stated "if yer boys are gunna do a run they should eat first." Her statement was met with a smile and a nod, ignoring his approving look she side stepped him and headed inside as he slowly trailed after her, keen eyes studied her as she walked with her eyes set straight ahead in attempt to ignore the urge to once again snap at the man.

* * *

><p><strong>I've been roaming around<strong>

**Always looking down at all I see**

**Painted faces, fill the places I can't reach**

**You know that I could use somebody**

**You know that I could use somebody**

**"Use Somebody" - Kings of Leon**

Hey everyone like promised here is chapter two, now just as a brief recap Rae let Rick's group into her special hide out (why is it so special you ask? Well you'll find out next chapter!) Also we learned that her father was the one responsible for 'pimping out' her baby, that the guys commented on in the first chapter! Learning something new with each chapter. ;)

Next time someone is bit and put down, and someone else has a close call but luckily someone else is there to help them out of a near death experience. ;) Ohh wonder who all those 'someone's' are. As always leave a review :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Black Beauty**

**Chapter three**

**Bittersweet **

*****_ Two Months Ago_*********

"It's fucked up." Melanie stated with her arms crossed in front of her, looking out of Raeanne's childhood bedroom window the pair watched disheartened at the sight of Clementine's fresh grave. Rae's steely gaze shifted to her sister as she mumbled her agreement, "not just that." Melanie stated jutting her chin towards the window referring to the fresh grave. "This whole world now, the dead coming back to eat the living?" She asked as a humorless laugh left her lips, "Yeah, it's fucked up." She paused turning her blue eyes onto her older sister. "Did I tell you that dad saved us, Jackson and I. Tammy turned into one of those, things." Melanie stated causing Rae's stomach to drop at the realization that one of their friends was dead. "She was bit, she didn't even tell me." Melanie continued flatly, before meeting her sister's worried gaze.

"She turned, Jackson and I didn't know what to do..." She paused looking back out the window, "she was our friend, ya know? Anyway, dad came and put her down." Rae watched Melanie noting how uncharacteristic she was sounding.

"He didn't have to kill Clementine." Rae finally stated suppressing a shiver as the world left her mouth. She felt sick at the mention of what happened, her father had killed her best friend's mother he didn't even hesitate barely giving the shock stricken family time to recover from what happened. Before he did it. Like she was one of those things, he took her life away. Fresh tears pricked Raeanne's eyes as her arms tightened around her midsection.

"She would have turned," Melanie stated coldly, "she would have killed anyone she could get her hands on, she wouldn't have hesitated to kill you." She stated piercing her sister was an icy stare, again Rae suppressed a shiver.

"She was still Clementine." Rae finally mumbled as her mind reached back to the man she had killed in her upstairs hall way, this new world had turned her and her father into murders. "Have you killed anyone?" Rae finally asked after a brief silence passed.

"No, but next time when I get my chance, I will." Melanie's statement left Rae cold and motionless as she watched her younger sister turn and leave the bed room. This world was changing all of them, and she feared that it was only just beginning.

* * *

><p>***<strong><em><span>Present day<span>_*********

Rae didn't waste any time breezing her way into the apartment and heading for her two bags beside the end table, that for all intentional prepossess looked untouched by the group. Eyes locked on to her from what felt like every direction. Rick, who was hunched over a map sprawled out over the island standing in the kitchen, was in the midst of organizing a small run to gather food in the area. Glancing up Rae briefly met the men's stares, all five of them were looking at her with slightly different expressions the one most common she realized was curiosity.

Glancing back into her bag as she kept digging she chanced a look out of the corner of her eye to the couch where the mothers and their children sat, and sure enough they were huddled a little closer together since she had entered the room, they shifted their eyes from Rae to the men, an air of unease around them. They didn't know if she was dangerous, they were skeptical of her. '_Good, let them keep their distance that way it's easier for them to leave in the morning.' _Rae couldn't see the blonde woman without turning around, but not wanting to look obvious she decided against it as she heard Dale walk in to the apartment. "Dale mentioned you were going on a run," Rae stated breaking the tense silence.

The look that shifted between Rae to Dale and finally on Rick was a reaction that most of the group had, "we're low on food." Rick answered honestly as he straightened a bit further, keeping his eyes on the girl that was finally looking in his direction instead of hiding her face in the duffle bag.

"I've ransacked every place within throwing distance to this one," she stated calmly in her a matter of fact way, "if you and yer man are going out, ya shouldn't do it on an empty stomach." Surprise was easily read on the faces she could see before her eyes flickered over to where Dale lingered just inside the door, a small smile firmly in place on his lips.

"Thank you. That's-that's very generous of you." Rick stated with a look in his eye that showed his gratitude, it was something Rae wasn't completely comfortable with as she shielded away from his gaze. All the thanks she was getting, helping these people it was dawning on her that they very well might be drawing the same conclusion that Dale had. That was something she would have to address if it was brought up again. Pulling a few bags of spaghetti noodles from her pack she set them beside her leg on the floor, as she searched for the sauce clenching her jaw as thoughts kept coming over her. Thoughts of the people that she had lost, of the ones that had hurt her, the dead, the last thing she needed was more people around to look out for.

A hand lightly touching her shoulder had the blonde rearing back quickly with wide eyes to be met with a wide pair of brown orbs, "sorry..." the woman spoke softly taking in how she had startled the other woman. Taking in a slow breath in attempt the calm her racing pulse Rae shook her head, "I wanted to thank you, for opening your home to us." The still unknown woman spoke in a gentle tone.

Squinting her eyes up at the brunette she stated calmly, "it isn't my home."

"Oh," the woman stated straitening up, "I thought...they're pictures of you in the bedroom." It came out sounding unsure, like she was confused.

Rae's shoulders sunk as she recalled her first day here when she took down every picture frame and left them on the bed, not wanting to see the constant reminded of all she'd lost "it was my uncles place." she stated quietly so only the ones actually listening would hear her, "I'll move those for you, so you can sleep there." Rae stated picking up the jars and spaghetti packs piling them in her arms.

"No need," the woman stated "I put them in the closet already." Rae paused mid step as her mind reeled, the closet wasn't a place she had checked since being here. "I hope that wasn't too invasive?" the woman asked noticing Rae's tense reaction.

Shaking her head Rae met her gaze, "no, I told you to make yourselves at home." She stated shrugging a shoulder, obviously a walker hadn't been in there or she was sure she would have heard about it the moment she had entered the apartment. "I didn't catch your name." Rae stated starting to feel awkward under the woman's gaze as she shifted on her feet.

"Oh, I'm Rick's wife, Lori. This is our son Carl." She stated side stepping as Rae's eyes landed on the couch and the little boy sitting there, it was at that moment she realized what she had done when the other mother got up to greet and introduce herself and her daughter, Sophia.

Nodding she sent a small smile to the girl that shyly hid behind her mother's leg, "you can call me Rae, how about I get to making this food." She stated about to walk away when a thought occurred to her, it was probably stupid but seeing as how she couldn't eat it anyway... "Sophia and Carl, was it?" she asked catching the kid's attention, they looked at her with startled expressions. "I have a few chocolate bars floating around in that bag over there," her statement instantly started the kids to stir as Carl shifted wide eyes to his mother bagging for permission "feel free to help yourselves to them."

"Mom?" Carl and Sophia questioned at the same time turning to their mothers.

"Are you sure?" Lori asked eyeing Rae who spared a small smile and a shrug.

"I'm allergic, someone maze well eat them." She stated catching the surprised look of the mothers and the pleading ones from the kids.

"Kids, what do you say?" Carol asked shifting her eyes from her daughter to Carl.

"Thank you!" Both of the children beamed before heading to the bag in question before pausing, "we can just go through it?" Sophia asked softly chancing a glance at Rae. It was refreshing, seeing children act the way they would have before the end of the world set in, Rae nodded.

"Course, ain't nothing breakable or dangerous in there." She stated with a shrug before making her way around the island surrounded by the men, before dropping her supplies on the counter beside the stove top. She had two duffels, one filled with weapons and personal items like clothing and things from her past, the other was dedicated to food and drinks as well as anything she needed that went with it. Water bottles and can openers, silverware and bowls all of it was kept in the second bag.

Rae ducked down pulling out a deep pot then standing up turned to fill it with water from the tap, "the water's still running?" A voice asked pulling her attention away to see Glenn standing on the opposite side of the island beside Daryl.

"It's running low, no hot water sadly but baggers can't be choosers." She stated turning the tap off when enough water was in the pot, placing in on the stove she paused again when Glenn continued to question her.

"How're you going to cook that on the stove?" He asked again as her gaze met his, "it's just the last I checked the power grid was down unless this place has a living backup generator."

Sighing she leaned on the still turned off stove, "actually it does, but this is a gas stove. It will still work long after the power does go out, that-" she stated pointing at the small old television set in the corner of the living room. "Will turn on, play a few VHS tapes. Won't get no paper view since the worlds gone ta shit, but if you get bored feel free ta see if we got anything ya might like ta watch."

The men eyed her unable to tell if she was being sarcastic or actually telling them to go ahead and watch some old movies lying around. Sighing Rae turned back to the stove and turned it on, gas stoves weren't like electric ones they didn't need time to heat up, it was something her uncle had loved about them and something she was immensely grateful for now. Tuning out the idle chatter that was happening behind her, Rae focused on making the food. Once it was done and strained she mixed in the sauce and opened up the cupboard to pull out twelve bowls.

* * *

><p>***<strong><em><span> Two Months Ago<span>_*********

"Uncle Bill?" Rae shouted forgetting to be quiet as she unlocked the front door of the restaurant to see it abandoned, it was a strange sight since it was dinner time and that 'Mabel's Diner' was always a busy place. "Bill where are you, we gatta go!" She shouted again looking around to only be scolded by her father by a shh-ing sound. The two exchanged irritated looks before moving on to go up stairs where Bill's apartment was. She was still angry with her father for his actions the day before; Rae only hoped that Uncle Bill would be able to reason with him.

"Bill?" Rae whispered again opening the door he never kept locked, the place was silent without any sign of Bill or anything else living or dead. Her heart sunk to the floor with the realization he wasn't here, which meant she had no idea where he was.

"He's not here," Charles stated voicing her thoughts with a sigh, "we've gatta go."

Rae's eyes widened as she spun to face her father, "but we can't leave him!" She stated sharply not liking the plan at all. He wouldn't make them leave…not without Bill, would he?

"We don't have a choice, you saw what happened with Clementine. We **can't **stay here." He stated causing Rae's face to fall, nodding she rubbed her arm before sending a look of anguish around the room and followed her father out. _'Saw what happened with Clementine' _she silently mocked, _'no' _Rae balled her hands into fists the only act of defiance she could do at the moment as she spitefully thought _'I saw what happened to Clementine.' _Rae paused by the counter where Bill would normally take orders and grabbed for a pad of paper and a pen, "what are you doing?" Her father asked as he paused by the door looking back at his daughter.

"I'm leaving him a note," she stated glaring at the paper as she continued writing than straightened and turned to leave, "I wanted him to know we came for him." She paused turning her stare on her father, Rae wasn't sure what she was supposed to feel she was scared, terrified but mostly she was mad at him, at the world, at herself. "I wanted him to know that we're heading to Fort Benning, that we're not abandoning him and that we will meet him there."

She didn't wait for his response as she brushed by him and exited the diner, heading to the cars that were waiting for the pair.

* * *

><p>***<strong><em><span>Present day<span>_*********

Rae had started on the dishes the moment her bowl was empty, taking plates and thanks from most of the group. It had only taken Lori and Carol seconds to flank her and start pitching in with drying and putting the dishes away. Something that Rae couldn't help but feel was surreal. The last of the dishes were taken care of and the three women shared a small smile, "Rick, mind if I have a word?" Shane stated straightening up catching his friend's eye and Rae's attention, cocking an eyebrow Rick turned to Glenn and Daryl.

"You two good to get ready to head out?" He asked the two men who both made a sign that they were, nodding his head Rick went to follow Shane out of the apartment.

Rae moved away from the kitchen heading back towards her bags, and snatched up her hatchet slipping the hilt into a belt loop before picking up the small flash light that sat on the end table and shoved that into her back pocket.

"Going somewhere?" Dale asked causing the two men who were also readying their weapons to pause by the door and send a look over to where Dale was looking, at Rae.

Turning Rae shrugged a slim shoulder, "no point in wasting the daylight, I still have stuff I need ta get done." she stated calmly like it was no big deal and like she was talking about house hold chores.

"And you're going out there on your own?" Dale asked again concern lacing his words, as he watched her walk to the door where she could make out the faint voices of Rick and Shane.

"Been going out on my own for a long time now Dale," she stated shooting him a forced smile "don't worry, I'll be back." With that she opened the door letting Shane's voice travel through the room loud and clear.

"Damnit man, what if she robs us blind?!" He had snapped just as the door opened, everyone seemed to freeze in place as a deathly silence followed. Rae's lips firmed as her stare hardened on the pair standing a few feet from the door, both staring back with wide surprised eyes. It was a moment that screamed the word 'Awkward' as everyone remained silent holding their breath for dear life almost afraid of what would come next.

A slow burning anger was starting to stir in the pit of Rae's stomach in the seconds everyone stood around without saying anything or moving, taking a deep breath in through her nose to help calm herself Rae started to move forward to continue on with her plan of action. Only pausing when she noticed Shane stiffen with each step she took. "Relax." She hissed out glaring at the man, "I ain't bout ta do nothin." she stated her Georgian accent coming out thick now that she was aggravated.

"Wait, where are you going?" Rick asked turning as she passed him with a look she didn't care to make out.

"Got shit ta do." she stated simply as she walked away, not standing around to hear the objections that were on the tip of his tongue.

"You're gunna fix that." Rick seethed taking a step closer to Shane pointing in the direction Rae had disappeared in, just as Glenn and Daryl stepped into the hall ready to go. "She is our host, Rae has been nothing but giving since we came here."

Rick's words hung heavy in the air as he locked eyes with his best friend, "Doesn't mean I trust er Rick, man you said so yourself this is the girl that held you at gun point. Something ain't right 'bout her." Shane stated eyes darting towards where he had last seen her, almost expecting her to still be there.

"She's been on her own," Rick stated with a sigh placing both his hands on his hips casting a brief glance around "who knows how long it has been since she was with people that weren't trying to hurt her. Give her time," he stated catching the confused look on Shane's face he stated "I'm going to ask her to join us." The word _'Again' _hung in the air loud and clear but remained unspoken.

* * *

><p>***<strong><em><span> Two Months Ago<span>_******* **

The tension was palpable, even with the Garland's being in a different vehicle fallowing behind Rae's Sierra Hybrid in their beat up minivan she could still feel it, like ice water running through her veins as her grip tightened on the steering wheel.

Bo hadn't wanted to travel with the Taylor family, something Rae couldn't blame him for. But somehow in the big blow up between her father and Mr. Garland he had managed to convince at least Austin who in turn had swayed his father and sister into agreeing to join them. The world was still far from extinct as Rae drove out of what was supposed to be a safe haven, her eyes constantly sought out other life forms in the hours she had been driving. Some people, she couldn't decide if they were the lucky ones or what they were, she'd spot walking down a street as if the dead were in fact dead and not a threat. Other times she'd pass by other drivers, all of them coming into the city she noted but said nothing.

More than once she spotted someone running for their life, or losing their life that was the hardest thing to drive by but with her father in the front passenger seat constantly telling her to ignore it she didn't have much of a choice. Rae's stomach dropped as a woman ran towards the road waving her arms wildly, probably calling out for help she realized as the thing the woman had been running from sunk its teeth into her arm tarring bits of flesh off. Rae's stomach turned as she slammed onto her breaks, nearly causing the minivan behind them to slam into their back bumper. "Keep driving." Charles, her father stated without so much as glancing towards the screeching woman.

Rae's stomach turned as she clenched her jaw, she had already seen a family go down by several walkers but this was only one walker. Firming her lips Rae swung open the door and jumped down from her truck, catching the attention of the walker who let go of the pour woman's arm and snarled its blood covered mouth in Rae's direction. It reminded her of a wild animal laying claim to its food. Rae didn't hesitate as she pulled out her gun and flicked off the safety walking a few feet away from the truck, raising it as the dead stumbled towards her. "Go back to hell." Rae gritted out between her teeth before pulling the trigger.

She watched as the third walker she had killed went down before her gaze shifted to the sobbing woman who was cradling her arm while she sat on the cold earth. _'She can't be any older than Melanie.' _Rae thought of her sister who was only twenty two who was so close and yet far away, sighing Rae closed her eyes before the sound of a gun going off had her eyes snapped open. "No!" Rae yelled as her eyes widened out of fear, her mind reeled taking in the scene of her younger sister standing beside the back end of her truck gun raised, one she had no doubt gotten from their father, pointed at the sobbing girl.

_'She missed. She missed.' _The thought had propelled Rae forward to stand between Melanie and the unknown girl who was now hysterical, causing everyone else to slowly make their way out of the vehicles. "No, we don't do this." Rae stated shaking her head as tears pricked at her eyes, her gun long forgotten hung limply in her hand.

"Get out of the way." Melanie snapped as her hands shock slightly.

"No." Rae chocked out as her father called her name, "no, we don't do this. We don't kill the living." She stated as her eyes darted between everyone that had come to bear witness, the moment her eyes landed on Savannah the younger woman started to sob as memories of her mother being shot came flooding back to her. If only Rae had been able to step in then, if she had known what her father would do she could have protected her as well. Rae watched as her throat tightened as Savannah and Bo retreated back to their Minivan deciding not to take part in the outcome. Austin stood rigid Rae noticed as she silently bagged him for help, "we don't kill the living." She repeated as her voice broke. She could never apologize enough for what happened to his mother and she knew just because they were travelling to fort Benning together didn't mean he'd ever forgive her.

"She's infected now." Her father stated as he made a move towards her, instantly Rae's gun was raised and drawn on him causing a stir among the group as he paused mid step. Rae stomach twisted as she realized what she was doing. She knew she wouldn't be able to do it, he was her father and Melanie was her younger sister there was no way that Rae would be able to shoot them even to protect someone…she knew she couldn't, they were her family her only living family left. And they had to know it to, she realized as her hand shook and she wondered what they would do now.

Taking in a steadying breath through her nose Rae attempted to steal her nerves before she spoke "I won't let you." She stated holding the gun tighter, "I won't go with you," she continued shaking her head sadly before wetting her lips "if you kill her, if you kill anyone else that isn't already one of the dead then you'll have to kill me too."

"Raeanne," her father breathed with disappointment lacing his words as he crossed his arms, "get back in the truck." He stated before lifting his gaze to Melanie, Jackson and Austin, who all stood watching the display "all of you, now." The order was firm leaving his lips but still Rae stood frozen unsure what this would mean.

Rae watched as both Jackson and Austin hesitated but finally obliged and got back in to their vehicles, while Melanie and Charles stood at opposite ends of her truck. "So what, we're just going to leave her to turn into one of them?" Melanie spat turning accusing eyes on their father, stiff was the only word Rae could use to describe her current body language, tense with anticipation and rigid with fear.

Charles eyes were cool, and Rae wondered what her father had to of seen to make him look so uncaring. "That's what your sister wants," he stated as Rae flinched she didn't 'want' the girl to turn, she just didn't want to see anyone else die. Her father turned his steal like gaze on her like he sensed her thoughts, "some things you have to learn on your own." He stated before beckoning Melanie back to the car one final time, Rae's gun was lowered once again as the sobs of the woman seemed to echo around her as she stared blankly at the place her father had been standing in moments ago.

* * *

><p>***<strong><em><span>Present day<span>_*********

The trip from the restaurant to the police station went by faster than Rae had anticipated anger did that though, she had only taken out four walkers on the way and was honestly looking to take out more. She knew she was over reacting, after all Rae would have worried about the same thing if the roles were reversed. Hell now that she was almost at the station she was starting to worry they would make off with **_her _**stuff. After all she was better of then they were at the moment, and most people wouldn't have hesitated to do so.

With apprehension that she might lose half her stash and irritation at being nearly accused of stealing theirs, Rae's steps were quick as she checked the front door of the station.

Locked.

_Shit, _she mentally cursed glaring at the door before glancing around to make sure she still had no unwanted visitors. Seeing the cost still clear she started making her way around the building to look for another door that might possibly be unlocked. Clenching her jaw she made the decision that if no door was left open for her she would simply take her chances and make one by smashing in a window. Yes it was a stupid decision, one that could cost her life. But she was nearly out of ammo, so she would just have to take that chance if it came down to it.

Spotting a door around back she paused to again look around before making her way over to it, licking her bottom lip when she noticed it sat slightly ajar she paused just behind it. Opened doors were a welcome wagon for walkers, and locked ones were normally best left locked. This building had one of each. "Fuck'n dandy." Rae mumbled eyeing the door with distaste. Taking a steadying breath she pulled the door open further, thankful when it moved silently. She wasn't going back without trying to get to the ammo, she wouldn't survive without it and seeing how many people were back at her place locked and loaded it left her feeling naked in comparison. Despite the appearance she tried to convey Rae knew they could easily take her for everything she had.

She waited a few moments keeping her eyes peeled for movement as they darted in all directions around her, waiting for anything to stumble out of the building but nothing came. Pulling the flash light out of her butt pocket she flicked in on, assuming that it would be dark in the station. Taking a step inside she flashed it around ahead of her illuminating the hallway she had just walked in to, with a sigh she reached behind her and closed the door firmly not wanting any strays to wonder in and take her by surprise. Rae moved quietly keeping the light low to the ground as she flicked it from wall to wall, not wanting to get caught off guard.

The hallway was lined with doors each one she checked by twisting the door knob and attempting to open them each one was locked much to her relief, seeing that the hallway was coming to an end Rae couldn't help but feel tense with this whole thing so far it was too easy which only meant one thing. That it was too good to be true. Wetting her lower lip Rae froze as she entered the main lobby of the station, hearing what must have been several moans she held her hatchet high as she sent the yellow light around the room seeing two prisoners in the two cells that were meant for temporary holding, standing inside groaning as they shook their bars desperately trying to get out.

A relieved sigh left her lips knowing that they weren't a threat to her she shined her light around the room again making sure she hadn't missed any walkers. She didn't spot any but the carnage that littered the floor told her that somewhere in here was most likely a walker wondering around.

Her movements paused seeing the light switches, it was a gamble but one that she was willing to take just to be out of the dark. Walking across the small lobby area she crossed over the hungry imprisoned walkers and flipped the switches, blinking at the sudden flood of light she smiled. "Thank god for silver linings." She whispered before boney fingers wrapped around her ankle, her eyes went wide as they snapped down to the ground seeing half a corpse of a cop dragging its body towards her, mouth hanging open as it made a grotesque gurgling noise.

Wrenching her booted ankle free of its grip she stumbled back a step, before sending a hard kick to the side of its head. Besides the sickening sound of the crack of having its head booted to the side, possibly fracturing its neck it turned back snarling. Rae's eyes narrowed in to a glair, as she kicked it again and again letting out some pent up frustrations. Killing walkers was the one thing she found enjoyable since she lost everything, the slight high it gave her afterwards as she forgot all her troubles was like a drug itself.

With one final stomp of her heel blood splattered up her boot and pooled around her feet but it didn't move or make a sound, the other two walkers however had riled up quite a bit as they watched. Sending a short sharp glair their way she sighed and glanced around for anything useful.

Spotting a map on the far wall she moved towards it to see if it would have the location of the armory on it, sadly the word didn't appear on the map but the locker rooms did and when she thought about it that those would be the rooms they padded up it made sense that the guns would be there too or at least nearby. She hoped anyway.

Turning she sent a last glance towards the now dead man, her eyes stopping at his holster. His gun was missing, _probably lost it where he went down, _she thought but the keys clipped on to his waist had a small smile forming on her lips before she moved to swipe them. Grimacing as she pushed back the thoughts of robbing a corpse, it was what the world had come to now, it was what she had to do to survive why she always had to remind herself of it was beyond her. Her eyes stalled on what remained of his lower half, both lags were missing leaving only bone and bloody tissue above where his knees had once been. Grimacing Rae stood and wiped her hands off on her pants not wanting to think of how many walkers might still be in here.

Turning Rae made her way down another hallway, this one was short only having bathrooms and change rooms marked on it, turning towards the change rooms Rae again grimaced. Both of the doors, the men's and women's were wide open. But there nestled between the two was a cabinet holding what she had come for, only thing standing between her and the ammo and guns she would no doubt take back with her, was a lock.

Sending another wary eye at the doors that flanked the cabinet she only hesitated a moment longer before moving forward and starting to try out the keys on the ring she had taken off the dead man. She stood fiddling with the lock as she tried key after key, when the sound of the lock clicking open sounded, her relief was short lived when the sound of shuffling feet caught her attention. Cursing to herself she glanced around but couldn't spot the walker, pulling the bag off her back she started grabbing the ammo first than moved on to the small hand guns and pulled down a single rifle and slung both of them across her back.

Groaning under the weight of it she stepped back satisfied that the trip hadn't been a waste, the sound of an answering groan had her turning as her eyes finally landed on the walker a good six feet away. He had been a cop, probably a desk cop since he looked like a staple donut eater.

Rae raised her hatchet as the dead rotting corpse charged her with hungry outstretched hands, he was more than three times her size and noticing how the bag was weighing her down gave her a disadvantage a wave of fear rushed over her.

Everything seemed to speed up as he charged her, Rae took a step forward and readied herself when he was within two feet she swung her hatchet but as he towered over her she connected with its cheek instead of the temple where she had intended to hit.

"Shit," she cursed out as blood splattered across her face and top as well as ran down her hand and dripped off her arm as she tried to dislodge her weapon. The walker snarled snapping his teeth giving her not only a nasty inhale of its rotting breath but also a view that would be sure to give her nightmares.

The walker attempted to lunge forward again causing her back to collide hard with the cabinet behind her, taking in a sharp intake of air as she kept a hand on its chest trying to keep it back far enough so it couldn't bite her. Her mind started to race, this was it, there was no way out of this one. She had all those guns, all that ammo and her only weapon she could get her hands on was stuck in the bastards joint that held its jaw in place.

She would die here, alone.

Her eyes widened as panic took over as she tried to push the walker back and pull out the hatchet all at the same time. How she hadn't heard him closing in on her was terrifying, she had let her guard down and would now be eaten alive. Her body went rigid as the walkers entire weight came down on her. Rae's eyes snapped closed knowing that nothing she could do would stop what was about to happen, her breathing became labored as she waited...and waited. The pain never came.

"Ya alive?" A gruff voice asked causing her eyes to snap open as the bittersweet realization hit her.

Daryl had just saved her ass.

* * *

><p><strong>No more dreaming of the dead as if death itself was undone<strong>

**No more calling like a crow for a boy, for a body in the garden**

**No more dreaming like a girl so in love, so in love**

**No more dreaming like a girl so in love, so in love**

**No more dreaming like a girl so in love with the wrong world**

**"Blinding" -Florence + The Machine**

Big thanks to everyone that has followed/Favorited!

Yay my first review! :) Thank you Dark-n-Twisty! Rae is(in my eyes) a strong independent woman who has experienced a lot in both the world before the dead and after, so I'm trying to show that like anyone she has her 'battle scares' that make her the way she is but also keep her relatable which is why I went with this ending for the chapter. Hopefully I balanced it out well.

Oh what do you guys think of me showing bits and pieces of Rae's past to break up the chapter?

I thought that it was a nice contrast to my other WD fanfic because in that one the character is shrouded in mystery where in this one you get to learn bits and pieces about Rae and how she handled everything. I don't indent on writing any real 'back flashes' from before the dead started walking, though some might appear so if there is anything you want to know about Rae feel free to ask and I'll attempt to shine some light on it in the next few chapters.


	4. Chapter 4

**Black Beauty**

**Chapter four**

**Restless Hours**

*****_Present day_*********

If she hadn't been seconds away from being walker chow Rae would have been irritated when she made it back to the apartment with Glenn and Daryl, who were supposed to be doing a run for their people but ended up on babysitting duty instead, normally she would have told Rick off feeling insulted but instead Rae remained quiet and brushed past the group. Dropping the heavy bag filled with weapons on the counter with a loud thumb as she ignored their questions that were being thrown around the room one after another, asking if she was alright and what had happened, turning Rae headed straight to the bathroom not feeling up to playing twenty questions at the moment.

With a shaky breath Rae leaned against the closed bathroom door dropping her composed face as she ran her hands through her hair, she could still hear the murmured voices from the living room as she rested her head against the door. Glenn she realized was explaining what had happened.

Closing her eyes Rae listened to the sound of their conversation, "No one goes anywhere alone," Rick was speaking now to his group "this is Atlanta for god's sake." Rae rolled her eyes as a small smile tugged at her lips, before she pushed off of the door and headed to the sink to wash as much blood off of her as she could. Rae glanced up at her reflection as she used the wet wash cloth to rub at the blood on her neck and face only stopping when her face began to feel raw. With a sigh she dropped the cloth in her uncle's hamper before turning to exit the bathroom. As much as she may have liked to, she couldn't hide in there forever.

Stepping out of the bathroom Rae paused noticing that everyone had been setting up sleeping arrangements, she shifted uncomfortably when Carol's eyes landed on her. The short haired woman offered her a smile "We left the couch for you," she stated.

Fighting back a frown Rae shook her head, she didn't want to be rude but the thought of sleeping so close to a group of strangers regardless of having her life saved by one of them still didn't sit well with her "no, go ahead." Rae nodded to the couch, "It's a pull out so it can fit more than one."

"Oh," Carol responded raising her eyebrows "are you sure?" she asked again as Rae shrugged and headed for the bags that held her food and clothes.

"Yeah, it's fine." She paused momentarily still feeling the woman's concerned gaze on her back, "I'll probably snag a booth down stairs anyway." The blonde stated pulling out some comfy clothes to sleep in, more importantly they weren't covered in blood. Seeing the woman nod in thanks Rae responded with a half hearted smile before turning to head back into the bathroom to get changed.

Everyone was settling down for the night, or majority of the Atlanta group was, while Rae sat down stairs in one of the booths sorting through the newly acquired guns and ammo as she worked on making sure each one was locked and loaded. So far she had avoided any real contact with anyone, besides the brief conversation with Carol, which Rae couldn't help but feel amazed at. The sound of the apartment door opening alerted her to an unexpected guest, and effectively shattered her triumph. "Can we talk?" Rick asked as he walked over to where Rae sat in a booth at a table.

Rae lifted her eyes up briefly as she pulled out a hand guns clip, "you can." She stated trying to sound disinterested while loading the weapon.

"I've been debating about how to go about saying this," Rick confessed with his hands on his hips as his eyes roamed over the number of guns. It was an impressive amount she had come back with, but the fact that she had gone in alone at all still left him feeling uneasy.

"Normally when ya have ta debate something, its best if ya don't do it." Rae stated with a tiny grin before glancing up at his troubled expression "was something my Uncle told me, when ya have to debate on something its cause you ain't sure about it," Rae sighed as her eyes roamed over the numerous weapons, "when you are sure about some'in than its right. Anything less is a waste of time." When she finished Rae lifted her gaze to meet his taking in how he contemplated her words, snapping the clip back into its place brought Rick out of whatever thoughts he had been in.

"Sounds like a smart man," Rick stated with a nod, "what you did today..." he paused as her eyes again lifted up to meet his, silently daring him to tell her it was stupid. "You know you've helped me and my people," he stated instead studying her for a brief moment, "if you need help in return-" Rick let the sentiment hang there as she turned back to her work switching weapons.

"I appreciate that," Rae stated calmly pulling another clip out of its place, again Rick's eyes shifted to the two piles she was making, the ones fully loaded and the two left to be done as he watched her fluid like movements he realized that she must have had experience in using the weapons.

"You work with guns before this?" Rick asked letting their conversation take a different direction.

"For a couple years," Rae stated realizing he wasn't about to leave, "why don't you take a seat. I'm sure it's more comfortable than standing." She stated waving to the bench across from her.

A small smirk tugged at Rick's lips as he obliged. "I was a cop." Rick stated catching her raised eyebrows when she looked up at him.

"No kidding," she eyed the uniform "and here I was thinking you just liked the uniform." She stated letting out a snort of laughter as the sarcasm dripped from every word. "Is this where I'm supposed to tell you what I used to be?" She teased lightly raising a single brow.

Shrugging a shoulder Rick smiled in return, "if ya want to." He stated not expecting her answer, and being slightly shocked by it when it came.

"Well officer, don't judge now." She stated waving a finger at him in mock warning, before she continued "for about six months before the shit hit the fan I was paying my bills by waitressing and dancing at a local bar." Rae fought back a blush as she read his shocked expression.

"And that's why you're good with guns?" He asked half heartedly trying to keep the image of her dancing at a bar far from his mind.

"Well it certainly helped." She laughed not telling him that the actual reason she knew how to handle a gun was that she had spent a brief amount of time in the military.

Rick nodded catching on that she wasn't going to tell him her whole life story just yet, he could respect that they had only just met after all. "Daryl and Glenn are going on that run in the morning." Rick stated catching her attention, "you're welcome to join them or if you need anything to let Glenn know." He offered watching her debate her answer.

"Nah, I think I'm good." She stated before adding "I'm going to get all ma shit together tomorrow, going to head out." Rick furrowed his eyebrows not liking the idea of moving on so soon but knowing the longer they stayed the more danger they would be in, before giving her a confirming nod causing her to bite at the inside of her cheek. "If you and yer people decide to stay here," Rae began to say as she finished the last gun snapping its clip back into place "could ya, if you have the time, lock up before you move on?" Asking the question left a twisting feeling in her gut, leaving her Uncle's pride and joy in the hands of strangers to make sure walkers didn't get in wasn't something she had thought she would be doing.

"We'll head out the same time you do." Rick stated catching her off guard as her eyes snapped back up to his, "we're heading to Fort Benning," he continued causing another strange feeling to twist in her stomach "if you're headed in the same direction, I don't see a reason why we can't all travel together?"

"I see." Rae stated clenching her jaw it was the question that she knew had been coming, the one that she had been dreading that had her debating on if she should leave in the dead of night to avoid the situation all together. "I'll think about it." Rae stated after a brief silence.

Her answer seemed to satisfy the man as he stood up, "alright then," Rick nodded sending a glance around the ground floor of the restaurant "goodnight Rae." Nodding her own goodnight she watched Rick walk off as she decided on what it was she would do about his offer.

* * *

><p>***<strong><em><span> Two Months Ago<span>_*********

Rae sat in the driver's seat of her truck, _'It's been four days.' _She thought while listening to the man on the radio, _'Four day's since I killed my first walker.' _Looking out the window Rae noticed Savannah talking with her father by their tent, _'Three day's since my father killer your mother' _Rae thought sadly before she spotted Melanie sitting with Jackson by the fire pit, _'And two days since we've spoken.' _The sound of the passenger side door opening and closing brought Rae's thoughts to an abrupt halt as Austin climbed into the passenger seat. "Jesus," Rae exhaled as her heart pounded in her ears running her fingers through her hair she took in Austin's boyish smile. "Trying to give me a heart attack?"

Shrugging Austin ignored her question "What ya listen'in to?" He asked shifting his blue eyes from her to the car radio.

Huffing Rae turned her own steely gaze to look back out of her driver side window, "Ryker's radio station. 'Sides the emergency broadcasts that are set on a loop he's the only one on the air," she stated avoiding looking at her best friend.

"Rae." Austin sighed worry evident in his tone, hesitantly the woman seated next to me glanced over. Rae didn't know what to say to her best friend, she didn't know what to say to any one in the Garland family, everything was just so messed up. "Rae, it's ok." Austin spoke again, frowning Rae knitted her eyebrows together and shook her head.

"Nothing ok," She stated in a whisper dropping his gaze she stared out her windshield again finding it easier to speak aloud if she pretended to be alone, "nothing will ever be ok again. My father killed your mom, Melanie…she." Rae chocked and closed her eyes, "she's trying to do what she thinks he wants of her. It's all messed up."

"You're right," Austin nodded agreeing with her as soon as she finished speaking, "but Rae, its ok to be confused and to be scared." Turning the blonde met his gaze her face empty of expression, "you're not back there again." Austin stated reaching forward to lay his hand on her shoulder. "He's not your commanding officer and you don't have to follow his orders."

"It feels like it." Rae stated keeping her voice even, "only worse, because now not only do I have to deal with the death of strangers I have to deal with my family and friends dying, with being forced to kill in order to survive." She paused taking in a breath to help steel her nerves, "I could do it." Rae stated with a confirming nod, determination clear on her face "If I had to I could do it all over again." She stated catching Austin's eye, "I could kill to keep the innocent alive, I could do it without blinking but what I can't do," again her eyes flickered over to her sister sitting with Jackson as her shoulders dropped, "I can't stand and watch the people I care about take lives that are innocent. I can't stand to watch as we become the monsters."

Austin stared at his best friend as silence fell around them, the pair had been best friends since high school and had known each other for even longer so it was safe to say that they knew each other better than anyone else. "This will blow over," Austin stated in his way that sounded like he knew more than she did, a hidden secret that she had missed.

"Yeah?" Rae asked in a whisper not feeling any comfort from his words, "and how many people will die before it does?" Flinching at her harsh words Austin ran a hand over his head.

"Look, I know right now things aren't their best but that'll change in time. The human race always bounces back, no matter how many plaques or wars come our way we survive and thrive." Austin stated sounding sure of himself. Doubtfully Rae stared back at him, she didn't have his optimism maybe the war beat that out of her or maybe she had never had it in the first place.

"When?" Rae snapped "When will it change? Before we're forced to keep moving because of the dead, before we lose someone else? Maybe before we run out of fuel or food?" Sighing Rae shook her head, "their still broadcasting that Atlanta is a 'safe zone' sending in all these people, families that won't stand a chance." Taking a calming breath Rae continued "It's going to get a lot worse before it gets better." She stated before opening the driver's side door and hopping down from her truck slamming the door roughly closed behind her the blonde wrapped her arms around her mid section as her eyes glued themselves to where her younger sister still sat, "it always does." She stated as a cool wind started to blow.

* * *

><p>***<strong><em><span>Present day<span>_*********

The night had proved to be a restless one, Rae had a problem and that was putting it lightly. With Rick's offer still weighing heavily on her shoulders it was hard to think of anything other than what she would do. Giving up on trying to sleep through the night Rae opened her eyes with a huff and glared at the nothingness that surrounded her, "I can't..." she whispered before wetting her dry lips and pushing herself up in a sitting position. Slowly she made her way out of the booth picking up her hatchet and a pistol she had left out, before slowly making her way to the stairs. Her mind was still swimming with thoughts of the day and of what she would do next.

Chewing on her lower lip as she made her way to the roof top Rae knew the longer she remained around this group the harder it would be for her to go her own way, that was just the way she was and every time without failure she always ended up regretting it. _'People. They were the real things to be feared, they were the monsters in this world just like they had always been.' _It was a fact that Rae hated learning, but one that she knew well, as much as she hated it that was the way things had always gone for her.

Pushing open the heavy door that let out its tell tale groan at being opened caused her to pause closing her eyes as the cool air hit her face, she still had about an hour or so before sun rise meaning the air was cold like the world was now. "Thank god, I was starting to think I'd be up here all night." A man stated pulling her from her bliss, blinking in surprise she watched as he froze in mid step apparently realizing his mistake. "Uh, I wasn't expecting...you." Glenn stated lamely confirming her suspicion.

With a faltering grimace Rae realized she wouldn't find her escape from her mind on the roof top like she had hoped, "sorry to disappoint." She stated with a shrug pushing off the ill feelings that nagged at the back of her mind.

"Oh, no worries..." he stated scratching at the back of his neck as she watched him shift awkwardly, "I was just waiting for shift change." He stated after a moment before looking back to the chair that he had been sitting in when she opened the door.

"I could take over," Rae stated jumping at the opportunity to be alone.

"You're sure?" He asked unsure of what else he could say, as she started to close the distance between them so they weren't shouting across the roof top not that anything would hear from up here.

"Yeah, ain't like I haven't done watch before. 'Sides can't sleep anyway so I was coming up for air." She stated standing a few feet away from him keeping her hands resting at her hips as her eyes skipped to the chair, rifle, binoculars, flashlight and book that were a welcoming sign.

"Sweet thanks." He stated with a smile tugging at his lips as he continued to eye her in the dark, he couldn't see her facial expressions but there was something about the woman that proved to throw just about every person in his group. "I have ta ask," he started catching her attention, "what do you do up here? It's boring as hell." His statement caused a genuine smile to grace Rae's lips.

_'Fall asleep from boredom.' _Was the response that came to her mind first but didn't pass her lips thinking that telling him that while trying to take over watch duty probably wasn't the smartest course of action. "Mostly I take inventory, when I'm really bored I start counting bricks." '_Until I fall asleep.'_ She smiled at the thought.

"Counting bricks?" He repeated raising an eyebrow not seeing the appeal, shrugging a slender shoulder Rae nodded.

"Boredom makes people do crazy things." She responded briskly.

Glenn nodded and went to leave, only pausing to turn around when he was a few steps past her. "Rae," he called once again capturing her attention "for what it's worth, I think it would be a good idea if you decided to stay with us." Glenn didn't wait for a response as he hurried off on his way, nor did he see the one he got which was a scowl and a glare directed to his retreating back. She watched him go silently, once the door was closed her shoulders dropped and she sunk down in to the camping chair with a huff.

_'Of course you think it's a good idea.' _She thought spitefully, '_you all think it's a good fucking idea.' _Sighing she dragged her hands down over her face.

_'I'm better off than you in every way. Why? Because I work alone.' _Biting her lower lip when her mind unwillingly went back to recant the day's events, including the part where Daryl had saved her ass.

Rae had vowed to never again trust another living breathing person, not with her belongings not with her life and sure as hell not to watch her back. But today, today it seemed she was breaking her rules when it came to them. Whether she wanted to or not, and now she owed Daryl her life something that made her feel physically ill. Trusting people had proven to be a death sentence, but as soon as she had seen those kids a part of her knew she couldn't let them die. Everyone kept thanking her -well nearly everyone anyway-, like she was some sort of hero but being a hero was against her rules too. She didn't want to be anyone's hero, she didn't need to have people around depending on her for shit she couldn't necessarily give them. It always ended the same way, with her being alone.

It was like a nagging voice in the back of her head, one that she dubbed to be her sister's and her uncle's both telling her that not everyone was out to get her. _"People will let you down." _Uncle Bill's voice rang in her ears, _"but you will never know, if you don't give 'em a chance." 'The hell good is that?' _She mentally spat with a scowl, '_giving someone a chance to get you killed in this fucked up world...giving them a chance to leave you behind.' _The thought wasn't one she liked very much, frowning her eyebrows lowered further.

_"People can surprise you. There is good in the world, you just need to be open to it. Not everyone is out to get you, ya know?" _Her sister's words echoed around her mind from a day long ago, long before the dead had started walking around. Before this world had corrupted them both. Closing her eyes Rae pushed back against the memories that threatened to overtake her, the last thing she needed to be thinking about was a previous war she wasn't in anymore. The last thing she wanted was to reminisce about words spoken between her and her loved ones after she returned from Iraqi.

_'People that are long dead, now.' _Sighing Rae slumped lowering herself further into the seat glaring at the building across the way, it had two stories on the restaurant. Her eyes were focused on a window, one of many that the building had, majority of them had their blinds down but that did nothing to disguise the fact that it was full of walkers. It was something that Rae hadn't been bothered with after she made it out the first time, but for whatever reason when she thought of the people that were down stairs being inside of that building it made her uncomfortable. But then again the thought of people alone made her uncomfortable.

Clenching her teeth she again tried to shake off the current thoughts that would only bring her back to Rick's offer, to what everyone was expecting of her. Aggravated that she couldn't escape from her own mind she got up and slowly started pacing towards the edge of the building, only pausing to look over at the bleak darkness below that hid most things from her view. But that didn't prevent her eyes from drifting to where she could barely make out the caravan.

_'I can't.' _She thought scowling, the two words held more meaning behind them than she liked at the moment. '_I can't go with them, I can't let myself __want __to go with them. People can't be trusted. I can't be responsible.' _Her mind raced with memories of her recent betrayal before they circled back around the day's events _'I would have died today.' _The thought unnerved her putting her physically and mentally on edge, _'If I hadn't met them, allowed them to take shelter here…I would be dead.' _Crossing her arms Rae tried to fight against the current thought that plagued her, _'how much longer will I survive?' _

"Ya planning on jumping?" A gruff voice pulled Rae back to reality as she whirled around heart hammering in her ears as her wide eyes narrowed in to a glare when they found Daryl standing beside the camping chair, cross bow slung across his back as he eyed her with what she could only assume was indifference.

"Jesus." She spat, "would it have killed ya to make some noise before giving me a heart attack?" Daryl simply shrugged at her comment before moving his gaze to glance around taking in the mostly empty space of the roof top.

"It's my watch." He mumbled before his scrutinizing gaze turned back on her, he had already known she had been up here when he talked with Glenn and he had even put off coming up in hopes she would get bored and leave. Obviously that hadn't happened.

He had nothing he wanted to talk to her about, had nothing he wanted to talk to anyone about really. He knew Rick's plan was to make her feel comfortable that way she would decide to join them, and Daryl was the last person that could pull that off. Rae had turned to look away from the man, only this time instead of peering down in to the darkened streets she gazed up at the sky. "Sun should be up within an hour." She stated out loud, it was September either the middle or the end she couldn't be bothered to be sure on which.

Daryl grunted in response as he observed the woman, not caring to talk about shit like the sun rise or the weather. "Thank you," Rae started talking again catching the man off guard when she turned towards him; his eyes searched her's briefly trying to get a read off of her. If he found what he was looking for Rae would never know.

Daryl's only response was a curt nod before raising his thumb to the corner of his mouth, Rae's lips pressed together in a small line returning the nod she decided to let the conversation drop. Rae stood silently shifting on her feet as her eyes danced around the street below then up to the sky that was slowly becoming a light shade of blue. A comfortable silence settled as Rae continued to let her eyes wonder the streets and surrounding buildings as she rocked slowly back and forth on her heels, she had even forgotten the hunters eyes on her backside as she lost herself in a daydream of a time long past.

_It had been Rae's sixteen birthday, her best friend Austin had blind folder her and had been leading her up flights of stairs slowly guiding her with his hand in her's as he walked up backwards. Rae had giggled softly when she stumbled forward and his grip tightened on her hands to keep her from falling._

_"Careful, one more step." He instructed as he led her through a doorway, a light breeze caressed Rae's skin as an involuntary shiver ran down her spine. _

_"Are we outside?" She asked confused since she was fairly sure they had just walked up two flights of stairs, when Austin's answer didn't come right away she continued to talk "can I take it off now?" _

_Austin chuckled dropping her hands and taking a step back, "alright, go ahead." He nodded as she pulled the fabric over her head and was greeted with a chorus of 'surprise' _

_Turning with a huge smile on her face Rae took in the sights of her family and friends all gathered around her with smiles of their own. _

That party had taken place on this very roof top, she sighed softly it had been the best birthday she had ever had and to think that it had only been eight years ago made her smile waver and fall. It was moments like these when she thought back that she was at her worst, because for just a moment after thinking of something so simple and happy like that she forgot that the people in her memories weren't here with her now.

The sound of movement had her wiping away a stray tear before looking over her shoulder, catching a glance of Daryl sitting in the camping chair brought her back to the realization she wasn't as alone here as she felt. "I'm a head down stairs," She stated when her movement caught his attention, Daryl gave her a curt nod and then went back to fiddling with an arrow he had removed from his cross bow. Not bothering to wait around any longer Rae started forward and headed for the door.

Not noticing when his eyes flickered towards her as she walked past him.

* * *

><p>***<strong><em><span> One Month Three Weeks Ago<span>_*********

It was around noon and Rae could be found walking through a small wood, filled with underbrush that brushed against her bare legs, frowning Rae glanced down at all the plants that rubbed against her calves _'better not be poison ivy…' _she thought glaring down at them as if they were her biggest problem. "Mels?" Rae called out to her sister who was a few paces ahead of her, still ignoring her of course which was why they were out in the woods with only each other in the first place. "Mels, come on!" Rae repeated for what felt like the hundredth time as they walked, they had been sent to collect fire wood for their the camp by their father, at least that was what he had asked them to do but Rae knew he was sick of the tension between the two and wanted them to hurry up and resolve it because he wasn't the only one, Rae hated fighting with Melanie. "Would you just talk to me?"

Huffing the youngest Taylor spun around irritated, "You want to talk about it? Fine. It always has to be your way anyway." Melanie mumbled crossing her arms as she glared off to the side

"Excuse me?" Rae interrupted clenching her hands into fists, daring her sister to repeat what she had said.

"You heard me!" Melanie snapped "you're always getting your way, even when you're wrong." The accusation left Rae with her mouth hanging open in shock, unsure of what to say or where her sister's anger was coming from.

"What're you talking about?" Rae asked knowing that this couldn't be just because her father had given in to her wishes when it had come to sparing the unknown girls life, no there was too much animosity in Melanie's voice for it to have been that.

"Everything!" Melanie snapped as Rae regarded her younger sister silently, "Ever since we were kids it's always been 'Rae needs this Rae needs that, Rae's so smart she's such a good girl.' You go off and join the military and get sent home with some rubbish PTSD story and it continues to be all about poor Rae. You want to know what I think?" She asked taking an angry step forward as she pointed her finger accusingly at the older blonde "I think you're weak that's why they sent you home, and that's why you couldn't pull the trigger on the girl who got bit." Melanie stated clenching her jaw as she dropped her finger and crossed her arms once again. She was tired of coming second, it didn't matter if she did what her father wanted Melanie never felt like she would measure up to her older sister she would always be the younger sister.

"I'm weak." Rae mussed aloud fighting against the pained feeling that her sister's words had brought her, "That's what you think?" The blonde asked meeting her sister's gaze head on, "You don't know what it was like over there, you have no idea what I went through." She stated before turning and started walking in the opposite direction of her sister. She felt sick, physically ill at the accusations that were being held against her. Never did she think that her sister would hold her PTSD against her like Mike had.

"That's because you never talk about it!" Melanie shouted causing her older sister to pause in her retreat, taking a steadying breath Rae steeled her nerves before looking over her shoulder to meet her sisters conflicted stare "I tried, I tried to be there but you just shut down, closed yourself off to the world." Melanie stated shaking her head, "just like you're doing now, you're turning your back on me. It's never been the other way around." Melanie paused sounding wounded, "you closed me out."

"You want to talk about this?" Rae asked quietly sending a worried glace around at the trees that stood tall around them. "Now?"

"Is there going to be a better time?" Melanie asked raising her eyebrows.

"Fine, where would you like to start?" Rae asked taking a step towards her sister, anger and hurt fueling her words and movements as she kept moving towards her younger sister. "How about when our caravan hit land minds and was ambushed?" She tilted her head seeing that startled look pass over her sister, "No? Okay how about how only two of us survived the initial bombs and gun fire, to only be taken and tortured for information?" Another paused as Rae crossed her arms and tried to fight back against the tears that were starting to burn her eyes. "Oh how about how I got to sit right beside a man as he was slowly torn apart as I begged for them to stop? Do you want to know when they finally stopped?" Rae asked as the tear finally started to fall from her cheeks. "They didn't, not until our people found us thirty six hours later that was how long we were tortured that was how long it took for Adam Carter, a soldier a father and husband to die."

"I…I didn't" Melanie stuttered with wide eyes taking in how her sisters form shook with each word she spoke and how pale she had become in the short time it took for her to relay the information.

"What?" Rae spat anger lacing her words, "You didn't know? Of course you didn't know! You were still in high school! What was I supposed to do unload all of that on you a seven teen year old girl?" Pausing Rae took a short breathing looking off to the side as she attempt to lower her voice and keep her raging emotions in check, "I was a first year medic, I wasn't supposed to be in the front lines where everything happens." Turning back to her younger sister she could see just how much her words had affected her, something she had never wanted to see. "You want to talk about weakness?" Again she paused letting her words sink in. "Killing someone when you don't have to is weak, it's weak and callous and makes you no better than the monsters out there the ones trying to eat us now, the ones that have always been around." Sighing Rae shook her head now barely speaking above a whisper. "You see a walker, kill a walker, that's fine. That's survival. A sobbing woman?"

Wetting her lower lip Melanie spoke "She was bit, she would have turned." Again she tried to reason with her sister, to make her see that killing someone that was bit wasn't wrong.

"When?" Rae retorted quickly, "in an hour? A day?" Pausing Rae shook her head still disappointed in her sister and father's actions, "We didn't have to stick around for that, and if we did than we would handle it when it happened not a moment before. Never before." Rae argued.

* * *

><p>***<strong><em><span>Present day<span>_*********

The day was passing by quickly, after breakfast it seemed like everyone had a job to do and no one was wasting any time. Daryl and Glenn had just gotten back after doing their run for the group that they hadn't gotten to the night before and then everyone was packing up and getting ready to move out no wanting to waste the daylight,

The children were playing a board game in the RV, that Rae had told them they could bring, where Andrea seemed to be hiding, the two mother hens were chatting away quietly beside the RV about what Rae didn't know and didn't really care. TDog was siphoning the last the of fuel from a few of the cars that their people had decided to leave behind, while Dale stood on top the RV watching for any walkers. It was an okay system, Rae would give them that at least they had a look out some people didn't even think of that.

Rae shifted on her feet beside the large truck that she had just finished loading up, as her eyes shifted to the two leaders of the group. Rick and Shane were going over a map on the hood of a car, with Daryl and Glenn at their sides when Rick glanced up in her direction and caught her stare she cursed knowing what would be coming soon. Rae closed the back door with a firm thunk that echoed in her ears as she watched the man straighten and square off his shoulders before taking long strides in her direction. She made no notion of moving an inch to meet him letting him make the entire walk alone as all eyes seemed to focus on the pair. It was her way of saying she didn't need this, didn't necessarily want it either.

"We haven't had a chance to talk," Rick began as his lips tugged in to a forced friendly smile, clearly having a lot on his mind and reluctant to have the conversation he was starting. "Have you thought about the offer any?"

Rae's heart hammered in her chest as she cast a look around them again taking it the faces trying to ease drop, she hated feeling like this hated the way she felt like she was a subject of some science project with all eyes focused in on her. It was unnerving. "I have." She nodded losing the edge that she was trying to keep, meeting his pleading gaze she gave him a small smile. "For now I'll head out with you," Rae confirmed "like you said we're headed to the same place." Truthfully she hadn't come up with a better excuse to get out of joining them, so playing it off as being temporary was her best bet something that Rick was quick to pick up on.

Pushing down the relief the man felt he let his fingers drum at his hips, "you planning on splitting off at some point?" he didn't need to ask, it was obvious that the young woman didn't want to be around people, much to Rick's dislike, the thought of her being in the world alone wasn't one he enjoyed entertaining.

"This, it's temporary," She stated honestly with a shrug of her shoulder, noncommittal "I don't work well with others Officer, I'm better off on my own." Rick pursed his lips not wanting to ask why she changed her mind and agreed to go with them, afraid she would change it back if he pushed to much, Rick nodded albeit reluctantly.

"Alright than, we'll head out soon." He stated with another confirming nod, more to himself than to her before turning and heading back to Shane who stood with a scowl, which seemed to be his default expression. Rae's gaze flickered over meeting the hunters stare briefly before he stalked off towards his bike crossbow swung across his back, apparently he was also in a crummy mood.

"That makes three of us." Rae mumbled under her breath as she dropped her shoulders and rubbed at the back of her neck, sneaking off in the middle of the night was sounding like a better option as the seconds continued to tick by. Going with them wasn't what she wanted to do, or at least wasn't what she thought she should do, but the nagging need to help the group of strangers was becoming a pain. Why she couldn't just say no to Rick and walk away was almost beyond her...almost.

Rae's eyes stayed on the RV for a few moments longer, if these people hadn't had kids she would have left a long time ago. She couldn't help but cringe at the thought of those two being the last kids alive and of course the thought of their close call the other morning not to mention having to grow up in this word, it made it that much harder for her to leave. Scowling Rae made her away around the front of her truck and hopped up into the driver's side, ready to drive off into the sunset whenever the rest of the Brady Bunch was.

* * *

><p><strong>Yesterday I died, tomorrow's bleeding<strong>

**Fall into your sunlight**

**The future's open wide, beyond believing**

**To know why, hope dies.**

**Losing what was found, a world so hollow**

**Suspended in a compromise**

**The silence of this sound, is soon to follow**

**Somehow, sundown**

**"Shattered" - Trading Yesterday**

Okay! Firstly let me thank: las1319894 and Anjonora for their lovely and supportive reviews! Also since my last chapter I've received seven more followers and one new favourite so thank you guys so much for the support! You all are amazing :)

The next chapter is still under-way so all I can tell you is this: Rae and Glenn share some 'alone time' and other's opinions of her become a little more clear suspicion and mistrust run at an all time high in the next few chapters! Rae has a chance to leave will she take it?

Review! 3


	5. Chapter 5

**Black Beauty**

**Chapter five**

*****_Present day_*********

They had only been on the road for a few hours and it felt like every few seconds Rae's eyes were bouncing between the road ahead and Glenn's hands that were constantly changing songs on the Ipod, according to Glenn it was the last working one on the planet, but that fact did little to ease her irritation. Rae started to click her tongue as she attempted to focus on the road ahead, her forehead creased as Glenn changed the song for the ump-teen-th time in a row without letting a song finish.

Biting on her lower lip to stop herself from snapping at her 'co-pilot' Rae glared at the back of the Winnebago that she was positioned behind, though stuck felt like a better word at the moment. Rae's monster of a truck was placed between a rock and a hard place, also known as Dale's RV and the Grimes Cherokee, she assumed it was to insure she didn't drive off and adding Glenn to the vehicle only added to the groups insurance. It was obvious that Rick had been relieved when she agreed to travel with them, so relieved in fact he wanted to make it as hard as possible for her to back out of it.

Though Rae didn't mind Glenn, she was already starting to wish he had given her a different babysitter...one less annoying would have been a better way to persuade her to stay. Now she was just eager to get out of the truck and put some space between herself and anything that could get on her nerves, as Glenn switched the song again it became clear that it would be futile and that everything would be more than likely getting on her nerves today.

"Jesus Christ! Glenn, knock it off." Rae snapped glaring at her Asian passenger, startled Glenn's gaze snapped up to meet her agitated stare causing his face to tinge pink from embarrassment.

"Sorry, sorry" he apologized raising his hands in surrender as a bashful smile tugged at his lips. "It's just that you have a lot of music on there and I've been stuck listening to the same CD over and over again since the world went to shit." He laughed rubbing at the back of his neck, "Guess I got a little over excited to listen to something different."

Withholding a sigh Rae tapped her fingers along the steering wheel feeling her irritation start to ebb away, letting the sigh escape her lips Rae tossed Glenn a small smile "That sounds dreadful," she snorted a laugh shaking her head. Even imagining hearing the same thing over and over again was enough to make her cringe. Smiling softly Rae continued to speak, "my sister," she breathed slowly trying to hide the pain speaking of her sister brought her as Glenn watched her intently, "she used to call me a hoarder." She laughed softly, before clarifying as she stared out the window shield lost in her memories "of music. I had this habit of finding a song I would like and then I'd download every album that the artist had made."

Silence had befallen the pair as Glenn took in the information, "how long has it been?" He finally asked looking at Rae from under his lashes, unsure of how she would react to his question.

Frowning her forehead creased, "how long has what been?" she asked glancing over at Glenn with a raised eyebrow.

"That you've been alone," Glenn asked as a heavy silence followed he continued to fiddle with his hands placing them on his lap and stretching his fingers out as far as they would go, when it seemed she wouldn't answer he continued to ramble on. "I mean, I'm only asking because I couldn't imagine being alone. Doubt most people could survive on their own for long."

Rae shot him a look then, not one of malice but one that was clouded with emotions he couldn't begin to read. "Not sure, 'bout two weeks maybe longer." She stated after her gaze returned to the road. "I stopped keeping count." Rae admitted quietly.

"I'm sorry," Glenn stated catching her eye, chewing at the inside of her cheek Rae nodded excepting his unnecessary apology, she couldn't help but to think it was silly to apologize when it obviously wasn't his fault but that was what people did when someone died, or at least it was what people used to do before the world went to shit. But now, in this world where everyone had lost someone it seemed so trivial.

The next few hours was filled with meaningless conversation, both wanting to avoid personal topics like life before now and lost loved ones. "Poker." Rae stated with a small grin.

"Poker?" Glenn repeated with a raised eyebrow in question, watching the blonde who was tenfold more comfortable now than when he had originally joined her for the ride. They had started a game of naming things they missed, of course everything was simple like Glenn's desire for a slice of pizza or to play a video game.

"Poker," Rae repeated with a nod and a full blown smile, "I'm amazing at it, can beat the best of liars." She stated eyeing him, "I bet you suck at poker." Glenn chuckled and nodded confirming her suspicions that he did in fact suck at playing that card game.

"Girls," Glenn stated before his face became tomato red.

"Girls? Seriously?" Rae laughed shaking her head, leave it to a guy to say something like that. "What it's the end of the world and you're looking for a piece of ass?" Her tone was playful as she eyed the young man beside her, she couldn't fault him lord knows she hadn't been intimate with anyone in a long time, but if she was being honest that was one of the furthest things from her mind.

"It's not like that!" Glenn shouted in mortification, "It's just..." he mumbled as Rae watched him expectantly "never mind."

"What? No, come on. No judgment promise." She stated holding up two fingers, "scouts honor." Glenn looked at her with skepticism not believing for a second she had ever been a scout.

Sighing he rubbed at the back of his neck again fighting the redness that had claimed him moments before, "it'd be nice to have someone through all of this, that's all." He stated squirming in discomfort under her stare. Rae hummed and tapped her fingers along the steering wheel mulling over his words in silence, "what?" Glenn asked with a sigh of defeat.

"Nothing," She replied quickly without looking over at him, lost in her own sea of thoughts.

"Seriously?" Glenn stared at her with an opened mouth, "after all that you're not going to say anything?" He asked stressing the last word with raised eyebrows.

"I said no judgment," Rae stated slightly amused glancing over at him squirming in his seat, "but if you really want to know what I think... Then I think that is bullshit." Rae's smile faltered when Glenn's face became hard to read, sighing she shook her head "not that you want someone, but that you don't already have someone. You're in a group Glenn," she elaborated "all of these people are going through the same thing, and you have them." She stated tapping her fingers along the steering wheel again.

Glenn bit back his comment knowing that she had a point, he wasn't alone sure he didn't have someone to snuggle up to at night but here he was complaining that he didn't have anyone when in reality she was the one that didn't have any one. Until now anyway. "So do you," Glenn stated catching her confused frown. "You have us now."

Rae felt her shoulders and arms go tense as her tabbing came to a stop, she didn't have them since she was sure none of them would understand what she had gone through and more importantly she didn't want them. Not that she could exactly tell Glenn that, though. So instead she said nothing and allowed the conversation to come to an end. As the caravan came to a halt Rae frowned exchanging an annoyed look with Glenn who shrugged his shoulders, "probably stopping for gas." He commented getting out of the truck to group up with the others that were doing the same, '_gas' _Rae thought eyeing her own dial that showed she still had half a tank frowning she leaned back in her seat. Her mood since she had been sitting in the truck with Glenn had been all over the place, '_Period's probably coming'_ she thought scornfully as she rolled her eyes her own mood swings were starting to give her whiplash maybe getting out to stretch her legs would do her some good.

Blowing a stray hair from her face Rae dragged herself from the truck only pausing long enough to grab the two hand guns she had stashed in the center console, tucking one into the back and the other into the front of her pants Rae turned and made her way to the group gathered beside the RV. Rick nodded at her arrival causing Rae to cross her arms as she took in the image of everyone standing around in a loose circle, Rae stood position between Glenn and Carol but stayed back far enough to remain on the outside of their inner circle. "Now that we're all here," Rick started to say gaining her attention as she was hit with the realization he had waited on her, "I'd like volunteers to join me in a sweep of the convenience store, someone to siphon fuel from those two vehicles over there," he stated nodding towards the two abandoned cars. One looking untouched as it sat in a parking spot, while the other had its driver's door left open abandoned at the empty gas pumps.

Glenn, Daryl and Rae had been Rick's only volunteers to venture into the gloomy looking store, but that had suited her just fine. The smaller the group the less people to trip over. "Okay," Rick nodded his thanks or approval as it was at the three before turning his gaze to Dale, "can you keep lookout?" Rick asked the older man.

"Course, I'll see them coming for miles." He smiled at the open landscape, this place appeared deserted but Rae knew better then to get comfortable just because it looked remotely safe. Looking up at the sky a scowl claimed Rae's lips, the clouds were starting to roll in something she hadn't noticed on the drive but it was clear that rain was on its way and if they didn't hurry they would end up being stuck here until the rain let up.

The four started walking the short distance to the blacked out convenience store while T-Dog and Shane got started on the two cars outside, Rae stopped pulling out a Beretta M9 from the front of her pants where it had been tucked in under the shirt as Rick and Daryl readied their weapons. Rae's gray eyes shifted to take in Glenn who stood at her side wielding a baseball bat, pulling her eyebrows together in a frown she took the young man in still finding it strange that he appeared to always be in the thick of things when he didn't look like he could hurt a fly.

"Don't you have a gun?" She hissed causing his attention to snap towards her.

Shifting uncomfortably Glenn shook his head, "never used one before." He replied as Rae sighed and pulled something out from the back of her shirt. "Holly shit Rambo, you always carry more than one?" He asked as his eyes shifted from the Beretta to the Glock and then to the hatchet that was still secured at her thy, apparently the other two men had also noticed as they eyed Rae with an unreadable expression.

"You have no idea," she stated with a small smile thinking of all the tiny weapons she could conceal on her body, holding the gun out towards him she shook her hand waiting for him to accept it "take it, if you get into a tight spot it'll be more handy then that." She stated nodding at the bat, reluctantly Glenn accepted her out stretched offer.

"Thanks," he mumbled weighing the object in his hand, with that settled Rae watched as Rick gave the group a nod before pushing open the store door.

* * *

><p>***<strong><em><span> One Month Three Weeks Ago<span>_*********

"Dad, we have to talk" Rae stated as she entered into her father's tent where he sat cleaning his gun, glancing up at her briefly Charles studied his oldest daughter. She reminded him so much of her mother it was painful at times. Rae frowned confused at the sight of the hand gun, "I thought you gave that to Mel?" she asked temporarily distracted.

"I did." He confirmed shortly as he continued to wipe down the barrel that was in his hand.

"Then why do you have it?" Rae asked with a raised eyebrow, it didn't really matter at the moment she preferred her sister without a gun but she was curious why he would have taken it back.

"She doesn't need it now, does she?" Charles asked without looking up at his daughter, "it's safe in the camp." He stated bringing her back to what she had wanted to talk about in the first place. The camp.

"That's what I wanted to talk about actually" Rae confessed crossing her arms as she watched her father clean his weapon, "for how much longer?" She asked gaining his attention.

"How much longer, what?" Charles asked without looking up at her.

"Will it be safe here?" Rae clarified, "We're supposed to be heading to Fort Benning, remember?" She continued shifting her weight "you know, where it is safe." Sighing she looked out the tents flap to the small camp they had set up, from her position she could see the burnt out fire pit and a little ways beyond that were their first walls of defense. "Cans tried to string won't keep us safe, we've been lucky so far. I think it's time we moved on." Looking at Charles firmed his lips and nodded slowly.

"Yeah," he agreed slowly, almost reluctantly.

"Then we'll set out?" Rae asked eagerness clean on her features.

"Not today, soon though." He stated turning his eye back down to his weapon. Pursing her lips Rae debating his words briefly.

"Tomorrow then." She stated before exiting her father's tent as he watched her back a small tilt to his lips forming, she was so much like his Lucinda.

* * *

><p>***<strong><em><span>Present day<span>_*********

"You really think we can trust her?" Andrea asked as she watched the four entering the gas station, before turning her gaze onto Dale as she stood beside him on top the RV.

"Now, I'm not saying that we have to," Dale stated with a sigh as he removed his hat and tiredly wiped a hand over his balding head. "All I'm saying is that we should give her a chance." He stated meeting her hard gaze, "she did save our lives, Andrea."

The woman's gaze hardened as she stared at the front doors of the gas station, unable to see through them her jaw ticked and tightened as she resisted snapping back that if it hadn't been for him she wouldn't have needed saving in the first place. "She held Rick at gun point," Andrea settled on after a brief tense silence.

Raising an eyebrow Dale fought a small smile, "If I recall correctly, so did you."

"Shane doesn't trust her." Andrea pointed out, like that was all the proof she needed causing Dale to shake his head at the mention of the other officer before placing his hat back on top his head in its rightful place.

"Rick does." Dale stated lifting his gaze to the gas station where said man was.

"Yeah," Andrea nodded with a pause, "he trusted Jenner too and look how that turned out." She stated before walking towards the latter.

"We're holding that against him now?" Dale asked baffled by her comment as he watched her leave without pausing to answer him.

* * *

><p>***<strong><em><span> One Month Three Weeks Ago<span>_*********

Each breath was a struggle, hypovolemic shock did that to a person it made their heart race and it could lead to death. It was hard to take in information as her vision swam with shapes and colors that didn't make any sense _'How'd this happen?' _Rae thought as she fought to focus on anything that was happening around her, "It's going to be ok." Melanie's voice filtered over the hum of static that was playing, "dad's gone to get the medical kit," she was saying as Rae struggled to follow along 'medical_ kit? For what?' _She wanted to ask but as her lips parted a soft moan was all that escaped them. "Shhh," Melanie shushed her as someone started pulling at her hands and arms, "I need help," Melanie stated as her head bobbed out of view, "she isn't letting me apply pressure."

Rae could hear the movement around the room as her eyes started to close, "hey, hey there, no sleeping on me now." Austin's voice invaded her ears as she opened her eyes barely enough to see that his face had also invaded her vision, "here," Austin nodded as he pried Rae's arms open, at first Rae noticed the white fabric that she recognized to be a towel being placed over her chest before the sight of her hands caught her attention. They were stained red with blood and dripping her life essence. Rae's vision seemed to stall on them as time felt like it started to slow down, her arms being held up and away from her body by Austin it almost felt like they weren't her limbs at all, because they could have been anyone hands covered in blood only the thin brown thread bracelet around her right wrist told her the truth.

Those were her hands, soaked in what she could only assume was her blood.

_'How'd this happen?' _Her thoughts circled around the question she had first though, _'how did we get here?'_

* * *

><p>***<strong><em><span>Present day<span>_*********

Rae followed Rick's lead as they stepped into the gas station, Rick took turns pointing to each person and then pointed towards an isle that they would check. Rae made her way down the furthest isle, her eyes trained on the lone walker that stood in the back corner as she realized that each row was in closed meaning there was only one way out of the isle and that was behind her now as she watched the undead man lift his head and sniff at the air. Frowning Rae continued to walk to the middle of the isle way, stopping she let out a low whistle gaining the attention of the walker.

He turned his gray eyes onto her as a grown left his lips and he start making his way towards her with outstretched hands, Rae held her gun raised as she took in the sight of him, his ankle was clearly broken as he dragged in along limping towards her. She glared at him reading the name tag that proclaimed him to be an employee of the gas station, he was slowly getting closer now close enough she could smell him and he was nearly touching her outstretched arm with his own. Rae pulled the trigger.

When nothing happened her eyes widened at the close proximity of the walker, again she pulled the trigger. "Damnit." She hissed taking a hasty step backwards as he grabbed for her hand barely missing, the gun wasn't empty she knew it wasn't. Angrily she flipped the gun over, holding on to the weapon by its barrel. Again the undead man lunged for her, swinging her arm Rae made contact with its temple knocking him to the ground/ Swiftly Rae moved and was on top of the walker, her knees pinning its arms to the ground as it snapped hungrily up at her, eyes slitting into a glare Rae brought the grip of the gun down on the walkers skull repeatedly only stopping when him rotting fingers stopped scrapping against her jeans and the blood pooled around his head and shoulders.

Her breathing became labored as she stared down at the unmoving, dead corpse. "Holly shit" Glenn recovered his one hands\ instinctively going for his hat as he rocked in his heels and the baseball bat swung slowly near his ankles, glancing over her shoulder Rae took in the three that stood a few feet behind her. Rick had his gun lowered hanging limply at his side studying her as she stayed in her position on top the corpse.

"Broad has issues." Daryl sneered breaking the silence as he eyed her with distrust his cross bow also lowered.

Clearing his throat Rick nodded at her, "trouble?" he asked unsure of what to make of the situation.

"Gun jammed." Rae said as her eyes went to take in the blood soaked weapon, frowning her hand twitched wanting to drop the gory weapon. Closing her eyes briefly she pushed up and get off of the corpse, opening her eyes Rae side stepped and turned to face Rick and Glenn, seeing that Daryl had retreated back into the store. "Shouldn't have happened," Rae stated lost in thought as she eyed the weapon that dripped the offensive crimson colour.

Rick nodded before turning and placing a hand on Glenn's shoulder, "help Daryl, collect anything that is useful." Glenn nodded before sending a worried look to the blonde that stood in the middle of the isle, before he turned and walked out of view. "We need to talk." Rick stated after a moment of silence passed, nodding Rae's jaw ticked as she followed Rick out of the gas station. The two stood looking at the scattered group a good twenty feet away standing around the vehicles, "are you alright?" Rick asked breaking the silence.

"I'm fine." Rae stated quickly, after years of practice.

Placing his hands on his hips Rick continued to look out at his group of people milling about, "I think we should stay here for the night, pick it back up by morning." Rick stated calmly before eyeing the woman, "thoughts?"

Rae raised her eyes surprised by the question before she shrugged and looking at the spot her truck occupied, "could use a break from driving." She agreed as Rick nodded again.

"We take turns doing watch," Rick continued, "you've been on your own for awhile, obviously you know how to keep an eye open for walkers. You interested in taking a turn?" He asked as her mouth opened and closed settling on nodding in response to his question. "Good, good." He repeated to himself as he gave another confirming nod before turning and walking back into the store. Standing alone outside of the gas station Rae stared blankly at the closed door chewing on her lower lip, _'He's a good man.' _She thought feeling her resolve slacken as she looked around the camp, her eyes found Shane who was standing at the front of the RV facing her, no doubt glaring at her. _'It won't do you any good' _she scolded herself for feeling anything from Rick's offer, _'Don't get attached, they don't really want you here they want your supplies.' _Rae closed her eyes briefly repeating to herself the words she had used when she had decided to cut off all other living beings, _'The weak ones are walker food, the good ones are prayed on by the ones worse than walkers. This isn't like before, people bring death in one form or another. Stay alone, stay alive.' _It wasn't the best mantra to repeat but it was affective all the same and hit all the right buttons, which in the end was all that mattered.

Rae had gone back inside to give the men a hand in collecting whatever was deemed useful, "Rae," Rick acknowledged her on entry before taking a look around "you mind collecting any feminine hygiene products, I'm sure the woman would appreciate someone who actually knows what they're looking for doing it." Fighting against the blush that wanted to rush to her cheeks Rae nodded, "thanks." Rae noted his small smile before heading down the aisle that had both the walker's remains and the feminine products. _'Probably why he asked me to do it,' _Rae thought choosing to believe that he asked because she made a mess of the aisle and not because she was a woman.

Rae did as she was asked and cleared nearly everything from the shelves that was deemed useful. Afterwards Rae went back to her truck and watched as everything was placed into the RV, apparently that was where they kept their stash if it could be called that. Resisting the urge to frown and tell them 'you're doing in wrong' she crossed her arms, because of course who was she to tell them 'you're surviving wrong' when they were in fact surviving. She chewed on her lip for a moment, of course they were a group where she was one person, which meant all of her gear had to be kept in one vehicle they had no such excuse. Shifting her weight from foot to foot, Rae shifted her gaze around camp everything was calm something she wasn't used to anymore.

Leaning against her front bumper Rae watched as the woman sat together sitting on lawn chairs under the RV's awning emerged in conversation, they brought back memories of a time when she'd be camping and doing the exact same with her mother and sister. Of course that was before the dead started walking around eating the living. Frowning Rae shifted her attention elsewhere shaking away the nostalgic feelings seeing the woman sitting together talking and laughing brought on, _'there's no time for that' _she scolded herself as a frown found its way onto her lips.

"Hey," Glenn nodded as he walked over from where he had been previously talking with Rick and a few of the other men.

"Hey." Rae responded neutrally as she watched him settle himself a few feet away from her. _'Probably still worried that I'm insane.' _She sneered to herself before looking away staring at the open space around them.

"I just wanted to give this back," Glenn stated pulling the gun out from underneath the back of his shirt, extending his hand he offered it to Rae who made no motion to take it.

"Keep it." She instructed him, "Besides after yesterday I have more than I need."

"Oh," Glenn opened his mouth unsure of what to say before tucking in back into his waist band at the back of his pants, "thanks." He responded as Rae nodded without looking back at him, "so um, how're you doing?" Glenn asked fishing for something to talk about. Rolling her eyes Rae turned to face her ever present babysitter.

"Fine, when do you get off?" Rae asked confusing Glenn whose forehead creased at her question.

"Get off?" He asked before his face started to tint a shade of pink hearing the words leave his own mouth.

"Of babysitting duty," Rae clarified rolling her eyes seeing how Glenn started to flounder with his words.

"Babysitting duty? What?" He sputtered, "I'm, I'm not on babysitting duty."

Sighing Rae sunk further into the bumper of her truck, "its fine, being cautious is a good thing. I mean I could be a serial killer for all you know," Rae stated in a serious tone that had the man squirming.

"A serial killer? You're not, are you?" His eyes had gone comically wide as Rae kept her stone like expression in place for a few seconds of silence before she chuckled and then shook her head in mild amusement.

"Wow, seriously?" she chuckled again before clearing her throat in a way that stopped her laughter, "obviously I'm not, but like I said it's good to be cautious." She eyes the man as he seemed to have relaxed at her display of being amused, "if there's anything you want to know, just ask, worse case scenario I don't answer or you don't like my answer. It's got to be better than being stuck on babysitting duty," she paused waiting for his response.

Glenn shifted again having not expected the turn in conversation, "well," he sighed thinking over what the concerns of the camp were, "Rick wanted to know how long you've been on your own, but I think that was more out of concern for you than anything, and you've already told me the answer to that one. So I think the main concern is if you're dangerous, and Shane wanted to know how you survived so long on your own." He spilled sounded relieved to get all of it out in the open.

"Okay," Rae nodded as her eyes danced over the people in the camp, Shane was talking to Rick over the hood of their car while Dale was on look out, these seem to be the normal positions for these three Rae realized off handedly. "Yes," she stated turning to lock eyes with Glenn, "I am dangerous, I couldn't tell you how many walker's I've killed but for the most part unless you are a threat to me you have nothing to worry about." She paused letting the information sink in, "and as for the second I have a system, a routine that has served to keep me alive."

"A routine?" Glenn asked confused.

Rae only nodded, "yeah, a lot of little things." Raising his eyebrows Glenn asked for an example, "well like an emergency bag, this bag goes everywhere with me. It holds two weapons, a day's worth of food and water as well as medical supplies in case of emergency. I suggest everyone get one, second since we're on the topic, I have to keep all my gear in my truck, why is all of yours in the RV?" She asked with raised eyebrows, when Glenn opened and closed his mouth without answering and sent a quick glance over to the behemoth of a vehicle the same question clear on his face, "if I were you I'd divide it up, split it according to how many people travel in the two vehicles, that way if you get separated there will be enough to keep each party fed and defended." She shrugged as he eyed her keenly.

"Was that something you did in your last group?" Glenn asked without thinking, pain flickered across Rae's face before she clenched her jaw to get rid of the unwanted emotion and nodded.

"Everything was split between the truck and the van." Rae stated, even though she didn't have to which caught Glenn's attention as he nodded.

"Rick's waving us over," Glenn stated after a brief silence, turning Rae realized that everyone had started to gather around the RV.

"Better go find out what he wants." Rae stated making no real motion to move

"Aren't you coming?" Glenn asked after he had taken a few steps away from her, sucking her bottom lip into her mouth Rae ran her teeth over it all of this human interaction was more than she had originally bargained for and was starting to make her resolve to leave weaken. Sighing Rae pushed off of the truck and stepped past Glenn without a word, as she made her way towards Rick and his band of misfits.

* * *

><p>***<strong><em><span> One Month Three Weeks Ago<span>_******* **

"This looks like a good a place as any," Charles, Rae's father stated as he turned the truck into a motels parking lot and killed the engine.

Rae seated in the front passenger seat looked around, "looks deserted," she agreed with a nod "no sign of any biters either." Melanie and Jackson were both quiet in the back as she glanced over her seat at the couple, "you two awake?" She asked even though she could clearly see that they were since he was playing with her sister's hair.

"Yes mom," Jackson replied smartly with a small smirk as he looked up at the older Taylor, suppressing a frown Rae nodded and turned to get out of the truck. Like she had previously observed, the area was uninhabited by the living or the dead at least the outside appeared that way, the blonde turned to eye the single level motel her eyes catching on its sign that was turned off either because the power had been drained or someone actually turned off the lights before they abandoned the place either way it didn't mean that there wasn't any undead within the motel rooms. "Blue Bird Motel," Jackson whistled after his feet hit the ground reading out the sign.

Humming Rae nodded than waved Jackson and her sister over, "come on let's go ta find out the plan." She stated as she headed over to where her father stood beside the van, Mr. Garland and his family were still distant as they stood just outside of their vehicle. If Rae was being honest she was sure that Bo and Savannah were keeping to each other and were simply along for the ride and nothing more, Rae realized as she studied the family before her eyes landed on Austin, _'He's still the same.' _She thought attempting to believe her own words, unwilling to think that his mother's death would affect their friendship. "So, what're we doing?" Rae asked after Melanie and Jackson joined the group. "Do we check each room?"

"Don't see the point, we're only staying for the night." Charles stated studying the motel, it wasn't large only twelve rooms plus the check in area. "It's small," He continued, "we'll clear a few, one for the Garlands," he nodded at Bo "one for us, and one for you." He stated eyeing Jackson.

"What?" Melanie gasped as she straightened, "Dad, no. Jackson stays with us." She argued before turning her eyes on Jackson, "with me," she smiled.

"This isn't some romantic getaway." Charles stated eyeing the two, "besides there are only two beds per room." He stated turning his eyes from his youngest daughter to her boyfriend, "not enough room."

"So than we'll share a room." Melanie interjected,

Sighing Rae rolled her eyes, "can we please assign beds after we are out of the open?" She requested eyeing both her father and sister.

Charles nodded and turned to eye each member of his group, "we'll split up into groups of threes," he stated "get it all done in one quick sweep. Garlands, you take number ten, Jackson and I will take number twelve," he paused again looking at his girls "Girls, you'll take eleven."

"I don't like it," Melanie stated as Rae pushed open the door seconds after everyone else had disappeared into their respective rooms, with her gun raised she rolled her eyes exasperated with her sister. "I mean why would he want to go with him?" Melanie asked following Rae into the small room, "he just wants to intimidate him." She continued to rant until the sound of moaning cut her off. Lying on the bed nearest the bathroom door was another one of the undead, frowning Rae lowered her dead as she took in the sight of the undead woman tied to the bed. "That's sick, who would do that?" Melanie asked as Rae's eyes cut over to her.

"Maybe they couldn't kill someone they loved?" The blonde suggested walking around the small area that consisted of the tiny kitchen table positioned under the window, a small two counter top with a sink and a fridge, _'No stove' _Rae realized as she continued to scan the room, besides the small kitchen there was only the beds and end tables. "Not much space." She stated kicking at an empty can that was littered on the ground, heading towards the bathroom to make sure it was clear.

"Aren't you going to kill it?" Melanie asked giving her sister pause, Rae glanced back at the tied up undead woman than to her younger sister.

"You said that the next one was yours," Rae stated as she stood between the bed with its restless occupant and the open bathroom door, "you have a gun?" Rae asked with a raised eyebrow

"Dad has it." Melanie stated staring at the woman who was trying to snap at her sister but could do little more than moan and making disgusting noises around the gag that was placed in its mouth. "Why is it gagged?" Melanie asked as Rae started walking towards her.

"I don't know," She stated eyeing the woman whose hungry eyes eyed her back, "it looks like one got her in the stomach," she stated nodding toward the blood stained material that was torn up, "was probably painful. Someone panicked, didn't want her drawing in more of the undead?" Rae suggested with a shrug not wanting to think about it any further before handing her sister her gun, "when you're done go and check in with dad." Rae stated heading back towards the bathroom.

"Won't you need this?" Melanie asked waving the pistol in the air.

"If there was one in the bathroom it would have stumbled its way out by now," Rae stated with a shrug.

"Than what are you doing?" Melanie asked as her sister reached the bath room.

"I have to pee!" Rae stated with a laugh, "God I'm tired of going to the bathroom in the woods okay?" The blonde smiled before turning to enter the bath room. It was small, with the tub touching the toilet touching the sink, Rae knew that she wouldn't find any undead corpses hanging around in the bathroom as soon as she stepped into it like she had said, it there was one in here it would have heard them talking and made its self known. Shaking her head Rae turned to close the bathroom door for privacy until her eyes locked onto a pair of dark brown ones.

* * *

><p>Don't you move<p>

Can't you stay where you are, just for now

I could be your perfect disaster, you could be my ever after

You could be my ever after, after all

I could be your perfect disaster,

Apologies, I'm not myself but I can guarantee

That when I get back, you won't believe

That you knew me well

Don't want to think about it, I'm fuckin' tired of getting sick about it

Now stand back up and be a man about it

And fight for something, fight for something, fight for something, oh

"Ever after" –Marianas Trench

Okay! I have to admit I don't feel like I delivered what I promised in this chapter, but if I recall corrected I did say in the next few chapters, but still so sad because all of my confrontational stuff but bumped into the next chapter, why? Because this chapter felt like it was taking for ever! Plus I still had three more scenes to write into it, so I decided that they would just be pushed into the next one. So yeah, sorry about that!

Anyway so chapter four received two reviews! yay :) So thank you to my ever faithful reader, las131984 and my mystery Guest for their lovely supportive encouragements I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter as much as the last! Oh and that you don't have me for putting someone behind the bathroom door ;) I know how movie cliché of me.

So all I can promise you for the next chapter is this: We will find out who is behind that door! What do you think good guy or bad guy?

Share your thoughts! :)


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